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Love and Other Problems: The First Step

Wednesday, June 15th, 2022

The First Step

I hadn’t really planned for my life to go in this direction, though I guess I should have expected that, because life and expectation have a discrepancy. It’s not supposed to necessarily be a bad change, but my life now is a cutting contrast to when I used to sit in the dingy, dry cafe outside of school, gossiping in hushed tones with the soft faces I had known for years. Now I sit in aptly-sized and aesthetic cafes with their overpriced coffee, and notably alone. I never gave extensive thought to how things would change and how strange that would feel. Now sitting here as I am on my cold, marbled floor, surrounding me are unseeing strangers with lips stretched around unfamiliar smiles and roads and alleys I could take one step into and find myself lost even with every map in the world.

In hindsight, I should have known that the thrill I felt to leave the place I had walked through for 18 years to go to college, would grow into the gnawing dread that had come to possess my lungs when I stepped foot in the airport the first time. The airport was like a limbo, the place people stopped to look through tall windows overlooking larger-than-life planes, looking at other people flying off to better or worse lives and wondering which one they’d belonged to. High school was a simpler time even if it had felt like university was the key to figuring everything out all at once. It had been the same people, same building and same structure for years, and though I felt like a dancer then, performing one routine over and over and ready to step out of the cradle of my stage, it was still a comfort. I didn’t think about how much of a comfort it really was until I started to feel the absence of my shiny rehearsed performance and polished stage floors and the faceless crowd cheering me on.

One thing that had felt difficult in particular was love. Love in all its forms and with all its nuances felt more out of reach. Youthful love and hate and heartbreak and drama had existed in a buzzing sort of confinement, not dissimilar to an agitated bee hive, and had been easier to find and keep. Moving to another city and leaving it all behind just felt like it meant letting go of every attachment I had with my favorite restaurants, my favorite spots at my favorite time of day and my favorite people. It was strange because even the kids I never really liked were part of a constant I had stickily attached myself to, and being uprooted from that was disorienting. Of course I had been merrily packing my whole life and never thought about it, until I was at the end of a hastily written chapter and facing my two best friends who seemed a grave sort of upset to my eerie calm. The moment I stepped through the gate and looked back at their weary faces, I knew we had taken our last picture together, smiling and heavy-hearted, because they would be moving soon as well. With that thought, I got through immigration blankly, a silent cacophony dancing in my head until I was at the gate, and then waited for my flight crying in the bathroom.

And then I sent my friends pictures of me breaking down to poke fun at myself as some sort of odd, ludicrous way of coping.

Perhaps it will get easier as I slowly integrate myself into the structure of this new community and the challenges and new comfort it brings. Maybe there will always be a part of me that will miss the ease that came with knowing what to expect and being told what to do, and the unadorned confidence in the knowledge that the people around me would stay the same. I had time back then, to get to know these people. The time we thought about was never in the context of workload, it existed with simple routines and little choices. Back then, my routine and method in befriending or getting to know someone was entirely based on knowing when and where I would see them; and that usually just consisted of either class, lunch, or after school. Now, that range is broader, so broad I could never list out every place or time or possibility if I tried –– and it makes keeping someone a constant harder, because one day you may see them regularly, but then the semester is over and you don’t have the chance again. Both of you forget about each other.

I recall going through notes for my chinese exam in a line at the Starbucks inside university during my first semester, and a tall, soft-eyed guy had struck a conversation with me on the course. It was a nice conversation, until afterwards when I had gotten my drink and walked to my table and promptly realized I forgot to ever get a name or anything, and being as bad with faces as I was (am), I knew I could be found looking him right in the eye and not have a lick of recognition. If this was school, I could ask anyone about who that was (because everyone knew everyone) and strike an easy friendship. Mildly disappointed, I had huffed and sat down, sipping miserably on my overly sweet frappe. Tough luck.

Since I realized how hard it was to keep in touch with people, and realizing how little people liked to follow routines, never being able to make friends or getting close enough to someone to love them has gradually grown into a crawling fear. Love, in all its forms of romantic and platonic and everything in between, suddenly wasn’t so simple. It was a challenge, a challenge I wasn’t exactly sure how to deal with. I was prepared to adjust to homesickness, to the difficulty that accompanied high-level academia, but I didn’t think love would be something that I found difficulty in. It had always come so easily to me.

I understand that love as a concept is complicated –– like the life that I shouldn’t expect to keep to a routine, love is like tides refusing to bow to the pull of the moon; rebellious, exhilarating and unpredictable. I thought it was something that would easily fall into place, that it would find me as easily as it did before, but I felt lost when it didn’t. But, as I knew about the discrepancy between life and expectation, I should have known of the discrepancy between love and it too. Love in all its appearances has been unexpectedly hard but taking control of it has been the solution that I have discovered. Leaving love up to fate does not seem to be the answer, so I am taking love out of fate’s palms and trying to do the best I can with it in every way available to me.

Like I used to have good food with my friends at cafes and restaurants, you can use this coupon to do the same and save money with a student coupon at the same time:

Mahrukh Shaikh is a student at New York University studying Business and Finance with a Marketing concentration. She has been writing and creating literature for years and is fond of various artistic mediums and social issues.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC, from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services. At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

Tags:college, college dating, college discounts, college life, homesick, love, onLove, teenage love, university
Posted in onLove, onValues | No Comments »

Hindsight is 2020: Starting College in a Global Pandemic

Tuesday, June 14th, 2022

On March 14th, 2020, I was on an Amtrak train headed from Philadelphia to Providence. Usually, the train is bustling with life, to the point where you’d think that finding a seat is impossible and your arms start to shake from the weight of the luggage you are hauling home (or maybe that’s just me—I tend to pack heavy). However, this time the train was nearly empty, desolate. When I finally did see people, they sat across the aisle from me and proceeded to clean every surface in sight with a bottle of hand sanitizer. This was only a small glimpse into what the next two years (and counting) would be like.

Just a week prior to this, I was at home and on spring break. Just four days prior to this, I was in my philosophy class passing around a huge bottle of hand sanitizer—the first line of defense. Just two days prior to this, I had turned 19, a sort of irrelevant birthday in the moment, but still the first one I had celebrated at Villanova University. I remember being homesick, but when I stepped off that train, it was the first time that I was not excited to be home. When my parents picked me up, there seemed to be a mutual understanding that I was not supposed to be there. Previously, I had only returned for holidays or breaks under the pretense of fun or relaxation awaiting me, but this time I had no expectations.

My friends and I celebrating my 19th birthday during our freshman year of college.

At that point, nobody knew how long we would be home—our administration projected that we might be able to return to campus by April 14th, a prediction we now look back on and laugh about. The reality is, when I stepped foot in my house that night after a six-hour train ride, it would be a long time before I would be able to step out of it without the lingering, irrational yet somewhat rational thought that just saying “hi” to a neighbor might result in exposure to an incredibly infectious and devastating disease.

At college, I was independent. I felt like I had a purpose, a place to be—whether it was at class, in the library doing work, or hanging out with friends. I had a somewhat consistent routine in place, and even if it was not always smooth sailing, I was enjoying being at college. When I was at home, I was back to being dependent on my parents, back in my small town, and back to my room that—per my own design—was cluttered and not as organized as my dorm. It all felt unreal, and it all happened so fast.

With companies switching to remote work and universities transferring classes onto Zoom, there were suddenly four people in my house all trying to get their work done. Things did not always go perfectly, but everyone tried their best to stay out of each other’s way, be mindful of our responsibilities, and keep things lighthearted. Of course, my dad’s version of this was to throw a snowball at me while I was on a Zoom call for class, but I have since forgiven him.

The first month after being sent home was, in one word, wild. People were stockpiling items like we were entering an apocalypse, nobody quite understood what was going on, and the death toll kept climbing exponentially. It was a difficult time to be a college student, but more broadly, a human being.

Bleak as the times were, I think there was one important lesson to be learned, and that was the importance of being flexible. People across the globe had to redefine their definition of “normalcy” and adjust to a new world, one faced with a global health issue. As much as students like myself did not want to go to college online or at home, and as much as professors likely did not want to teach in these ways, we all nonetheless worked together to make the best of the situation. Life can change so drastically in just one instant that we need to lean into those changes, reevaluate our routines, and rethink the way that we do things to better serve our needs. Most importantly, we need to be flexible with others, and understand that we are all just trying to do our best to get by.

I guess if I had to pick another lesson, I would say that if you have the option of attending class every day in your pajamas, definitely take it. Or, find small ways to treat yourself each day, such as visiting Pavement Coffeehouse at one of its locations in Boston and using this coupon:

By: Katie Reed

Katie Reed is a senior at Villanova University studying English and Communication. She is in utter disbelief that she just admitted to being a senior. She loves to read and hopes to enter a career in the editing and publishing industry. She is also patiently waiting for Volume II of Stranger Things 4 to come out on Netflix.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC, from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services. At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

Tags:adjustment, college, college life, covid-19, online classes, student discounts
Posted in Family, onCollege, onHealth, onValues, University | No Comments »

Refreshing Tea at Möge Tee

Thursday, June 2nd, 2022

When hot weather hits, one of my favourite things to do is get some refreshing cold tea. Today was no exception; after a long walk in the blazing summer sun, I stepped into Möge Tee for a moment of rest. Located a few blocks from SVA, this small trendy shop offers a variety of food, sweets, and drinks for patrons to choose from.

While I am a fan of bubble tea, I have never ventured far into the world of “new style” tea. Under the guidance of the friendly gentleman at the cash register, I ended up getting a fresh black grape tea. To say the drink was revitalising would be an understatement! I am often hesitant to try grape-flavoured things, but I am so happy that I gave this a try. It lacked the artificial nature that fruit drinks often have, instead relying on a fresh fruit taste. The boba at the bottom paired well with the subtle tartness and overall sweetness of the flavour profile. It wasn’t too sugary, making it ideal for a day marred by thick hot weather.

Pudding happens to be one of my favourite desserts, so I was thrilled by the softness of the (very cute) tofu pudding. The surface had a little bounce that gave way to silky softness. I enjoy custard and I enjoy tofu and found that this pudding happens to be a good middle ground. The tofu helped lighten the dense sweetness of the custard, allowing it to be a nice airy snack!

Growing up, I’ve eaten my fair share of eel. It’s always been something I’ve greatly enjoyed– a taste I’ve certainly grown fond of because of my father’s love for it. Eel rice balls have thus been one of my go-to bites. I have to admit that Moge Tee’s might be a new favourite of mine! It was hot, the rice perfectly sticky and the seaweed crisp. The eel was tender and the kabayaki sauce wasn’t overwhelming. Each element was balanced and ended up being a great way to end my stop.

I can say I’m a fan of “new style” tea now! Thus, I want to go back to Möge Tee soon so I can experiment with other options. I’ll also certainly be picking up a few pudding cups and rice balls to go. If you would like to drop by to try their food and drinks, bring your student ID and the coupon below for 15% off your order.

By: Ehani Schneiderman

Ehani Schneiderman is a senior studying literature and anthropology at The New School. She hopes to connect with others through writing, poetry, and cultural exchange. When she isn’t nose deep in a book or word document, you can find her paddle boarding in a bay or scuba diving out at sea.

Tags:college, college discounts, food, fruit, pudding, tea, yum
Posted in onCollege, onFood, Restaurant Reviews | No Comments »

Classic Arepas and Classic Tastes

Wednesday, May 11th, 2022

Just a stone’s throw away from Washington Square Park rests Classic Arepas, a Venezuelan restaurant offering bright decor and bright flavours. As I stepped in, I was immediately struck by the uplifting sunlight and the kind staff. The energy of the restaurant matched the energy of the May weather outside– warm and welcoming!

I hadn’t had arepas before, so I wasn’t quite sure what to order. Jose helped me decide what to get, offering me a wide array of options from the menu. As a drink, I got the maracuya (passion fruit) juice. I am a lifelong fan of all things passionfruit! When I got my drink, I wasn’t disappointed in the slightest. It was ice cold, a perfect contrast for hot spring weather, and sweet without being overwhelming.

For food, I started with the cheese empanada. I have to say… This was, without a doubt, one of the best empanadas I’ve ever had! It was fresh and warm without burning my tongue. I loved the way the inside filling and the outside layers merged together, complementing the flavour of the other. It paired well with the maracuya juice, with the tartness cutting the softer nature of the cheese perfectly.

Afterwards, I got to try two arepas! I had the Classic Reina (shredded chicken and avocado) and a custom with shredded beef, plantains, cheese, and black beans. They were amazing! While they had different flavour profiles, they were both delicious. The Classic Reina was milder, with the chicken blending with the avocado nicely. I liked how it allowed the dough to shine alongside its fillings! The shredded beef packed a more flavourful punch and worked really well with the sweetness of the plantains. I happen to be a lover of plantains, having grown up eating them, so I really enjoyed the way they stood out to my tastebuds. Just like the empanada, the arepas paired perfectly with the maracuya juice!

Overall, I had a great time at Classic Arepas! The staff was kind, the food was fresh and tasty, and the energy of the space was comforting. It’s only been a few hours, but I’m already craving more! Needless to say, I’ll certainly be heading back. If you would also like to try some of their arepas, bring the coupon below and your student ID for 15% off.

By: Ehani Schneiderman

Tags:arepas, college, college savings, empanadas, food, yum
Posted in onCollege, onFood, Restaurant Reviews | No Comments »

Defining the Next Step

Friday, April 22nd, 2022

I am officially in my last month of college. As the weather warms and Union Square fills up with people who yearn for sunlight, I’ve come to reflect on the last four years of my life. While I have spent many hours thinking about my college experience this semester, the frequency of these thoughts has multiplied tenfold. At 23 years old, it feels as though something in my life is coming to an end.

I’m trying to think of it less as something concrete and harsh and instead as something fresh and challenging… A new chapter, so to say. But that doesn’t feel quite accurate. We spend a large amount of our lives in academia; from when we first step out of our parent’s arms and onto the playground to when we walk across a grand stage to receive our diploma, we are in a state of learning. What comes after, if you don’t pursue grad school, is a different kind of life. I feel, to some unnerving degree, overwhelmed by the concept of a “career”… I am scared by the idea of taking my first few steps into an industry I’ve dreamt about since I was a child.

In past chapters, I’ve written about how intimidating it is to have a passion. This applies to having dreams as well. When you grow up dreaming of something, of working towards it, it can feel as though the moment you can start working in that dream will never come. Suddenly though, as you’re filling out graduation forms and job applications, it hits you. You realise that you’re done building your tools… Now, you have to use them. A lifetime of mounting pressure becomes real and you understand that you’re standing at the starting line of a career you’ve always wanted to pursue.

This has, unfortunately, various detrimental effects on the psyche. It roots up points of uncertainty and self-doubt, preying on questions that grind at your mentality. It begins to make you wonder if this is what you want to do– if you’ve dedicated the last four years of your life to the right thing.

What helps with this kind of wobbly footing? I’ve found myself searching through my own archives for solutions, for as often as these questions crop up, so do reminders of my love for literature. What I’ve come to realise is that I am not beholden to one single path. Just as I’ve explored and expanded my interests in school, I can do this again with my work. I’ve realised that this starting line isn’t for any kind of linear race; rather, it is simply a point of departure for a new adventure. It opens up my world to new opportunities, experiences, questions, ideas, and interests. Whatever I choose to do next is not something I am stuck with; instead, it is something I can learn from as I move through the world.

Something else I’ve accepted is that this is not the end of my academic life– at least, not if I actively fight against it. I want to keep learning. Four years is not enough for me to feel adequately fulfilled by academia… But I realise that I don’t necessarily have to pursue grad school right away to continue my education. We are all humans who can choose to continue learning every day. We have an endless universe of knowledge right at our fingertips, not just via the internet but by the conversations we can cultivate in our lives. We can read novels, articles, and blogs. We can attend talks and plays and social events. We can meet people at book clubs or sign up for a class in something we’ve never tried before. The possibilities are endless… And so are our connections with other people.

As we move through the world, pages of our individual stories get turned. What feels like the end is the start of something else. By expanding our view and access to the world, we expand our knowledge. Each step we take is a step toward a new experience… And perhaps new passions and dreams as well!

By: Ehani Schneiderman

Tags:college, graduation, passions, self-improvement, writing
Posted in Creativity, on Writing, onCollege, onValues, Writing | No Comments »

Chillin’ Out at Cutlets Sandwich Co.

Sunday, April 17th, 2022

On a beautiful Friday afternoon, I walked over from class to Cutlets Sandwich Co. for a bite to eat. The interior was modern and cheerful, lit up by both the front window panes and the friendliness of the staff. The airiness of the storefront complemented the upbeat Spring breeze of New York City streets– a welcome respite from a week full of long assignments and lectures.

After perusing the (impressively) extensive menu, I decided to order their #3 on a roll. The sandwich was made up of their signature chicken cutlets, fresh mozzarella, broccoli rabe, balsamic vinegar, and basil pesto. I was excited to try this option, as I am an avid fan of all things broccoli rabe and basil pesto related!

The sandwich did not disappoint– there was ample filling and each ingredient was able to stand out on its own while still working with each other. Often, I find that sandwiches can be overwhelmed by breadiness. This wasn’t an issue though; I didn’t have to remove any excess, so it was certainly well balanced! I appreciated that it was warm too– I’m not quite fond of cold mozzarella when I order a roll. The chicken retained its crispiness and wasn’t dry! It was seasoned well and paired nicely with the nutty taste of the pesto. Overall, I was pleasantly surprised by how good it was! I immediately was sad to have finished it when I took my last bite.

A friend who had ordered the #14 (cutlets, mozzarella, tomato, basil, and pesto) told me that they give the food a 10/10 and would certainly be back! We relished our Brooklyn Best peach tea and peach tea lemonade, a subtly sweet and refreshing way to cap off the meal.

Cutlets Sandwich Co. is only about 15 minutes away from The New School– and I’m super excited about this! I look forward to heading over again soon to try some of their other options. Their food was a great way to end the school week and kick off a nice Spring weekend! If you would like to try their sandwiches, use the coupon below for $6 off your first order with the code CLIPPER!

By: Ehani Schneiderman

Tags:chicken, college, food, sandwich, yum
Posted in Cheap Eats, NYC Student Guide, onCollege, onFood, Restaurant Reviews | No Comments »

Rainy Day Hibachi at Okinii

Saturday, April 9th, 2022

On a rainy Spring day, a friend and I visited a restaurant south of Washington Square Park. Okinii, located on Thompson Street, offers a variety of sushi and grilled foods. Upon entering, the staff greeted us and asked if we wanted to be seated at one of the hibachi grills. Since it had been a while since either of us had this, we agreed and were escorted to our seats.

Our waiter, a friendly and attentive man, asked us if we wanted anything to drink. We ordered some green tea; it came out hot, perfect for a cold and windy day, and was steeped so that the elegant nutty flavour came through. Our waiter always made sure our cups were topped off with fresh tea!

Pondering over the menu for a while, we decided to both get the shrimp and steak combo. All hibachi meals come with either white rice or fried rice and a soup or salad. I ordered the soup and white rice whereas my friend ordered the salad and fried rice. The miso soup had a nice mild flavour, the scallions and tofu complementing it. The salad was crisp and fresh with a sweet dressing. Both were great light options to start the meal off with!

Soon after we placed our order, Steve, our chef, came out. His energy and friendliness were contagious and had us grinning as he prepared our food! He started with the fried rice and then moved on to the vegetables, and then the steak and shrimp. The entire time, we chatted and joked and marvelled at the way he expertly handled the food preparation and flames. It was certainly a great mid-week pick-me-up and Steve definitely knows what he is doing!

Steve’s hibachi skills aren’t just for show– the food came out perfectly! Steak and shrimp can be chewy and tough if over or undercooked, but both were on the grill for the right amount of time. They were also seasoned so that the salty-sweet flavour of the sauce came through– but they didn’t overwhelm the natural flavour of the meat! The fried rice wasn’t greasy or overly oily and paired well with the vegetables. Everything balanced out nicely, and I ended up cleaning my plate and leaving with a full stomach!

Okinii was an incredibly fun stop! I will definitely head back– especially with a group of friends. The staff are great and the food is tasty and always hot. If you would like to visit Okinii, use the coupon below for 15% off either your first online order or your in-house visit with your student ID!

Tags:college, food, hibachi, yum
Posted in onCollege, onFood, onValues, Restaurant Reviews | No Comments »

A Good Day for Goody Fresh Dim Sum

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022

Along the bustling sidewalks of 6th Ave rests Goody Fresh Dim Sum, a small restaurant that serves… Well, dim sum! Upon walking in, I was met with images of the restaurant’s dishes and a bright-but-cosy aura. The staff were friendly and kind, immediately offering a nice change of pace from the brisk outdoors. It was a welcomed energy, as the conclusion of midterm season had left me craving warm vibes and tasty bites.

I hadn’t had dim sum in quite a few years; in my quickly paced New York City life, I simply let more and more time pass since my last venture into a cuisine I loved. I was excited to finally have some again – and Goody Fresh Dim Sum did not disappoint. It was difficult for us to narrow down what we wanted to try since there were plenty of mouth-watering options. After spending more than a few minutes wondering what to go for, our waiter offered some house recommendations.

I am no stranger to shrimp dumplings or siu mai… They’re two of my absolute favourite things to eat! Thus, I was very excited when these two dishes came out from the kitchen. The shrimp dumplings were pillowy, puffed up by generous amounts of shrimp. Dipping them in soy sauce gave them just the right amount of salt needed to create that complex flavour profile I love. The siu mai were seasoned just as I like them– a subtle amount of sweet to complement the savoury as you chew. When my dining partner took her first bite, she exclaimed, “These are where it’s at.” I would be hard-pressed to disagree! They just may have been the best siu mai I’ve had. What I love about these two foods is that there’s a kind of gentle mildness to them while still being packed full of flavour. They’re comforting foods to me – perhaps this is why I always go back for more!

Up next were the soup dumplings. I have been eating soup dumplings since I was a child– they were a dish I would drag my parents out to get as often as I could. These dumplings brought me back to those childhood days. The soup inside warmed my wind-chilled fingers and the filling melted on my tongue. Sometimes soup dumplings fall apart as soon as you pick them up, but these certainly didn’t! They stayed intact, only giving way when I finally took a bite. This was great, as I got to fully enjoy the soup packed inside without spilling any. These dumplings were both a pleasant throw back and warm up.

Last but not least are two dishes I hadn’t had before. A joy of mine is partaking in new foods, and I was glad to not only try these, but also love them! The first was the BBQ pork bun. The bun was soft as a cloud, and the pork inside was smothered in a sauce that was to die for. I enjoyed how the chunks of meat contrasted the fluffy nature of the bun, leading to a nice texture that complemented the taste. The other dish was mushroom dumplings. I am a fan of dumpling, I am a fan of mushrooms, and now I am most certainly a fan of mushroom dumplings! The taste of the mushrooms came through in an almost smoky way, truly letting a great flavour profile shine.

I am very happy that Goody Fresh Dim Sum is only a few steps away from The New School, as I will certainly be returning to relax and eat after a long day of classes! I am excited to go back to not only experience flavours from my youth, but to try new things as well. If you would like to also go and try out their variety of options, use the coupon below for 15% off with your student ID.

By: Ehani Schneiderman

Tags:college, dim sum, dumplings, food, Warmth, yum
Posted in Cheap Eats, onCollege, onFood, Restaurant Reviews | No Comments »

Don’t Get Too Comfortable

Friday, February 25th, 2022

Comfort is, as humans, something we all crave. We want to feel secure in order to feel comfortable in new environments. Despite this, comfort is not your friend on your first day to a couple of weeks on campus. The biggest mistake that incoming college freshmen can make, a mistake I made myself, is allowing yourself to feel overly comfortable.

The first friends that I made in college were my suitemates. Originally it was the four of us and I was comfortable with that. Who else would I really need to be friends with if I was best friends with the people I lived with? Despite this, within a week we agreed that a complete friend group required more members and we looked to expand. So, I made friends with a girl that was in all my classes. Who better I thought? A good friend in every class? Sounds good to me. Eventually, her group of friends and my suitemates, and I became one big group. BAM! College friends = Complete. A group of 8 people was enough.

The problem is that I gave up even looking for other friends. It never occurred to me that even though this worked it didn’t mean it was for the best. What I gradually learned over the entirety of my freshman year was that I was wasting my college experience because I felt I needed nothing more than what I already had, I was too comfortable with where I was. That’s not the point of college, the point is to truly find yourself and others who compliment who you are. Allow yourself to be a little choosey when finding your “college friends”. High school is a time for friendships of convenience, people that you will see every school day for 12 years, your options are usually significantly more limited than a college campus. Branch out! Try everything you can! Anything that sounds remotely interesting, try it. The worst that can happen is that you lose an hour of your life. The best? You can find a new part of yourself that you never considered before that you never had the opportunity to uncover.

How would I do it differently if I had the opportunity? I would do everything I could to meet as many people as possible. You never know who your group will consist of, or where you’ll find them. Most colleges have sites that detail the clubs that can be found on campus. Make a list of the ones that sound interesting and try to make it to at least two meetings for them. The first meeting is to see if it’s even a club dedicated to something you want to invest your time into, and the second is purely for meeting others. Talk to the President, the Vice President, the Treasurer, the Social Media Coordinator, or anyone you can get your hands on. Try to feel the vibe of the people within the club. In an unexplainable way, each group of people will feel different, see what the feel of each group is. After that the next step is easy, there are only so many hours in a day, and you can only spread yourself so thin. It’s better to be able to give each thing you pick the attention it deserves. Don’t over choose or over-commit; only take on as much as your schedule and your mental health limit you to. Prioritize the groups with the most people that make you feel special and appreciated. Long term, those are the most important factors for long-term friendships. You should always feel that the group believes your presence is not just welcome but additive. Find the people that make you feel that the group wouldn’t be the same without you. Those will be the college friends you look back on later in life!

With all the new friends you’re going to be making you’re going to need fun activities to do, check out Boston Paintball and get 100 free shots!

By Cameron Maurice

Cameron Maurice is a Northeastern Senior studying Business and Communications. His passions lie in Television and Movies and he hopes to work in the Entertainment Industry in the near future.

Tags:college, college clubs, comfort zone, freshmen year, Friendship
Posted in onValues | No Comments »

Alone, But Not Lonely

Sunday, October 24th, 2021

College is full of contradictions. On the one hand, it feels like you are never alone; your roommate is constantly in your room, the libraries are always full, and the dining hall line seems never-ending. It’s impossible to walk down a street in New York and not move past herds of people sipping iced lattes, chatting with their friends on the phone. Not to mention, the subways are always crowded, filled with commuters and business people on their way to work. And it seems like the lines for coffee shops are becoming increasingly longer…and pricier.

And, yet, life can still feel so isolating. You’re away from your family—maybe for the first time—and it feels like everyone has rushed into meeting people, feeling the need to replicate the high school friendships of times past; late nights are spent studying in the library for a class filled with students from all over the world, none of whom you know; and you move through the dining hall, interacting only with those who serve your food and eat it at a bench outside. Sometimes, the subway cars are empty, leaving you alone with your thoughts and little distractions; a walk in the park can feel lonesome, your only company being the nearby birds and ducks. Overall, the feeling of the city is new and unknown.

“Save my love for loneliness” by Aftab Uzzaman is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

It can be difficult as a new student to reckon with these two extremes of constant companionship and lasting loneliness. Doing both is healthy, but spending time in one state can be mentally (and physically) exhausting for you, especially as you are finding your way in college. Therefore, it is necessary to find a happy medium where you’re content with meeting people and spending time socializing, but also learn how to take time for yourself.

That’s why, when I am alone doing an activity typically done with others, I think of myself as alone…but not lonely. I have learned throughout my time in college so far, how to take time for myself and go out in the city by myself. I am content with doing activities alone because I don’t necessarily have to be lonely! Throughout the next chapters of my book, I will share activities I have done both alone, and with a friend, demonstrating how every day as a college student in New York can be an adventure—but an adventure that is okay to take on by yourself when needed.

Main Reminders:

College can be extremely exciting and fast-paced, but also isolating. Don’t be shy to take time for yourself and recharge when needed!

By Rania Borgani

Rania Borgani is a second-year student at Barnard College, majoring in the Economics Department with a focus on the political economy. She spends her time writing and editing for a campus news site. When she’s not working, you can find her reading, drinking copious amounts of coffee, or walking aimlessly around the city with friends

Tags:alone time, college, navigating the city, self-care
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