Posts Tagged ‘freshmen year’

Don’t Get Too Comfortable

Friday, February 25th, 2022

Comfort is, as humans, something we all crave. We want to feel secure in order to feel comfortable in new environments. Despite this, comfort is not your friend on your first day to a couple of weeks on campus. The biggest mistake that incoming college freshmen can make, a mistake I made myself, is allowing yourself to feel overly comfortable.

The first friends that I made in college were my suitemates. Originally it was the four of us and I was comfortable with that. Who else would I really need to be friends with if I was best friends with the people I lived with? Despite this, within a week we agreed that a complete friend group required more members and we looked to expand. So, I made friends with a girl that was in all my classes. Who better I thought? A good friend in every class? Sounds good to me. Eventually, her group of friends and my suitemates, and I became one big group. BAM! College friends = Complete. A group of 8 people was enough.

The problem is that I gave up even looking for other friends. It never occurred to me that even though this worked it didn’t mean it was for the best. What I gradually learned over the entirety of my freshman year was that I was wasting my college experience because I felt I needed nothing more than what I already had, I was too comfortable with where I was. That’s not the point of college, the point is to truly find yourself and others who compliment who you are. Allow yourself to be a little choosey when finding your “college friends”. High school is a time for friendships of convenience, people that you will see every school day for 12 years, your options are usually significantly more limited than a college campus. Branch out! Try everything you can! Anything that sounds remotely interesting, try it. The worst that can happen is that you lose an hour of your life. The best? You can find a new part of yourself that you never considered before that you never had the opportunity to uncover. 

How would I do it differently if I had the opportunity? I would do everything I could to meet as many people as possible. You never know who your group will consist of, or where you’ll find them. Most colleges have sites that detail the clubs that can be found on campus. Make a list of the ones that sound interesting and try to make it to at least two meetings for them. The first meeting is to see if it’s even a club dedicated to something you want to invest your time into, and the second is purely for meeting others. Talk to the President, the Vice President, the Treasurer, the Social Media Coordinator, or anyone you can get your hands on. Try to feel the vibe of the people within the club. In an unexplainable way, each group of people will feel different, see what the feel of each group is. After that the next step is easy, there are only so many hours in a day, and you can only spread yourself so thin. It’s better to be able to give each thing you pick the attention it deserves. Don’t over choose or over-commit; only take on as much as your schedule and your mental health limit you to. Prioritize the groups with the most people that make you feel special and appreciated. Long term, those are the most important factors for long-term friendships. You should always feel that the group believes your presence is not just welcome but additive. Find the people that make you feel that the group wouldn’t be the same without you. Those will be the college friends you look back on later in life!

With all the new friends you’re going to be making you’re going to need fun activities to do, check out Boston Paintball and get 100 free shots!

By Cameron Maurice

Cameron Maurice is a Northeastern Senior studying Business and Communications. His passions lie in Television and Movies and he hopes to work in the Entertainment Industry in the near future.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.


Psychotherapy and Me

Saturday, September 27th, 2014

Henri Matisse's The Goldfish

Henri Matisse’s The Goldfish

“I’d like a hug,” I decided on my last day. We proceeded to discuss the details of our hug – where we would place the arms, when to terminate the embrace, how tightly we would hold each other. After agreeing on my comfort level, I stood and hugged her, a tad tighter than we had initially agreed on.

We pulled apart and she asked, like a typical therapist, “What are the tears in your eyes about?”

Tear ducts unabashedly hot, I replied, “I don’t know; what are your tears about?”

My therapist was crying. She was crying for me, for the progress I’ve made in the past three years, for the impending separation to come. My time with her was not over – I still planned to have a session every month – but everything from this point on will be different. That much, we both knew and expected.

A week into college life in New York City, and yes, everything has changed. My cat doesn’t mewl for food every morning. The night is noisier, both in and out of my head. I’m surrounded by strangers who all seem like they’ve got it together. I miss the convenience and privacy of my room, long drives while blasting music, and the Henri Matisse Goldfish painting that hung on my therapist’s wall. Everything is different, including me.

Four years ago, depression plagued me. It seemed the only things I enjoyed were sleep and razors, constant worrying, and constant headaches. When I began seeing my therapist, I was an ugly, unromantic mess. I said, “I can’t imagine myself not having depression.” Depression was a parasite that scarred my arms, legs, and cheeks. I weighed on my few friends until they broke and left me, exhausted by my exhaustion.

Four years ago, I could have never survived my first hectic week at New York University. Though self-doubt never quite disappears, it has diminished greatly over the course of recovery, helmed by my therapist. Without her, my ship would have been smashed to bits on the reef. Without her, I would not have found the willpower to brave my way through life’s complexities and simplicities.

Living the college life with depression is precarious. Many young adults have not reached any level of self-comfort yet. Many suffer undiagnosed. This is why I urge everyone who suffers from even mild symptoms of depression and anxiety to reach out for help – be it through college or through local connections. Don’t let the stigmas of therapy and mental illnesses prevent you from getting the professional help you need and deserve.

The poster of Henri Matisse’s Goldfish on my dorm room wall is a reminder that therapy can (and already has) helped me thrive during the overwhelming college experience. These days have the potential to become the most wonderful days of your life – don’t let yourself drag you down.

In a series of eight blog posts, I will discuss what I have learned throughout my journey through depression, and how I have overcome my demons. With a little advice and self-help, maybe you can, too.


ChristelleMarie Chua, New York University ’18

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