Archive for June, 2021

Rapid Revival Restaurant Review: The Chippery

Friday, June 25th, 2021

“The Chippery” sounds like an industrial horror of the Victorian age, a place where child laborers chip away at rocks with pickaxes while being whipped by slavemasters for hours until all the strength leaves their tiny little bodies and they’re hauled away to uncomfortable cots where the dust in their lungs leads them to convalesce with pneumonia throughout the dark, terrible night, upon which that bugle sounds the coming of dawn and they are woken up to repeat the same thing all over again. But actually it’s a place that serves fried fish.

The restaurant itself is cozy but very small. There’s just one tiny table in the corner and it seems like you’re supposed to order out. The staff are very nice people, though I’d imagine they could get a little claustrophobic.

The menu had deep-fried oreos but if I eat any more oreos I would die, so instead I got the calamari.

Once again, the calamari is a combination of tentacle segments and whole small squids, with a lot more of the latter than usual. The batter is nice and crunchy and the pieces at the bottom aren’t soggy which is pretty rare. The flavor is subtle, but it goes well with the provided sauce even if it isn’t my thing.

The fried fish itself is extremely fried, with a very thick layer of crunchy batter. It tastes very good but is somewhat cumbersome to actually eat due to the way it’s curled on itself, meaning that it’s hard to cut without accidentally tearing off a large portion of the skin. Fortunately both the fish and batter taste good on their own. The eponymous chips are apparently made with a secret flavor, which I can’t actually describe the taste of under threat of legal action. The chips themselves are good, crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside. I’d recommend scraping some of the seasoning off them onto the fish.

Verdict: 8/10 Matthew Calamari indictments

https://www.campusclipper.com/new/popup1.php?CUP_COD=4030

By: Alexander Rose

Alexander Rose studies satire at NYU Gallatin and wishes he was actually just Oscar Wilde. He is interested in writing, roleplaying games, and procrastination. Describing himself in the third person like this makes him feel weird.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.



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Rapid Revival Restaurant Review: Coopertown Diner

Tuesday, June 15th, 2021

Some places are just too good to be worth giving a sardonic introduction to. Coopertown Diner is one of those places. It’s a cozy resteraunt designed with a 50s theme to give a nostalgic feeling to people who almost certainly shouldn’t be allowed near any of the food they serve lest it pop their aged veins. It just has an all-around friendly fell, even if the tables are a bit sticky. And the food. Oh god, the food.

This is an oreo milkshake. It is a testament to the hubris of man that I was even created. It’s a bit hard to drink at first because of the clumps of crushed oreos but the more you drink the easier it gets. It tastes like happiness. I will die from drinking too many of these and I won’t regret a single one.

Normally I eat plain burgers but the guy recommended the rodeo burger with mushrooms and cheese. They both helped the burger have a unique but great taste. The fries were also really good, crunchy outside and squishy inside. The onion rings were lukewarm and chewy but I didn’t even order them so who cares. Overall, the Coopertown Diner is just a fantastic restaurant. Eat there.

Verdict: 9.5/10 triple-stuffed oreos

(They forgot to upload the coupon to the website so watch this space)


By: Alexander Rose

Alexander Rose studies satire at NYU Gallatin and wishes he was actually just Oscar Wilde. He is interested in writing, roleplaying games, and procrastination. Describing himself in the third person like this makes him feel weird.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.



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Rapid Revival Restaurant Review: Westside Market

Friday, June 4th, 2021

What is a restaurant, really? Is it a place that serves any sort of food to customers? Must it necessarily have a place where you can sit down and eat your meal? Could an ordinary store be considered a restaurant? I have absolutely no idea, but here’s a review of a store anyway.

Westside Market is both a market and located on the west side, surprising absolutely nobody. They have pretty much everything you’d expect from a market, ranging for avocados to zebra meat (I don’t think they actually have that last one but I couldn’t think of a food that starts with Z). [My editor has subsequently described to me the concept of a food called “Zucchini”, though I’m skeptical of it’s existence.] If there’s something you’re looking for, they probably have it. They also make their own food, which is what I reviewed. Be aware that there’s no seating so you’ll have to eat somewhere else.

I ordered the breaded chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans. The beans were quite good. They were a bit sweeter than green beans usually tend to be, but in a good way that makes them go well with the chicken. The chicken itself is also sweeter than normal, though again in a positive way. The breading is also quite tasty and sticks well to the chicken. The potatoes were someone inconsistent in temperature, with parts being hot and parts being cold, but otherwise they also pair very well with the chicken.

They also make their own desserts, so I got the chocolate mousse. It’s pretty high quality, with different flavors of chocolate that contrast each other in interesting ways. It was denser than I thought it would be, but that’s actually a positive since it means there’s realtively more mousse in there.

Verdict: 7/10 Market Gardens

https://www.campusclipper.com/new/popup1.php?CUP_COD=3922

By: Alexander Rose

Alexander Rose studies satire at NYU Gallatin and wishes he was actually just Oscar Wilde. He is interested in writing, roleplaying games, and procrastination. Describing himself in the third person like this makes him feel weird.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.



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