Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’

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Relationships with the City

Tuesday, July 9th, 2024

Making the move to college can be an incredibly overwhelming and stressful process, but moving to college in New York City can be even tougher! Just like that, you’re tossed into a bottomless melting pot full of cultures, people, religions, you name it! In the mix up of decorating your dorm and forming new relationships, it can be difficult to understand the major transition you’re going through. Building a community is much like building up a relationship from scratch. Though it’s the key to a successful transition to college, sometimes New York itself can feel unapproachable or oversaturated.

In order to learn how to approach the city, it’s crucial to understand it first. In an effort to better understand the culture of New York, I reached out to Professor Marry Rocco. As Director of Engaged Scholarship, Community Engagement and Inclusion at Barnard College, Professor Rocco holds extensive knowledge in the fields of urban planning and community development. Not only is Professor Rocco knowledgeable about urban studies in general, but she has also completed numerous research projects and programming centered around the New York City region. Professor Rocco’s background makes her the perfect authority to better understand what keeps New York’s gears turning. Only when you comprehend how the city functions are you then able to find your place in it. Somewhere amongst the thousands of gears, wheels, and cogs, there’s a missing screw that only you can fit in.

A Día de los Muertos Performance in front of the New York City Public Library at Grand Army Plaza. At the time, the library was paying homage to Jay-Z with Black Lives Matter and other Black themed decorations. An interesting intersection of communities, taken on 35mm film.

While you might be excited about living your New York City dreams to the max as soon as possible, it’s important to first recognize the intersecting communities that you are joining upon move-in day. Prior to leaving home, you’re already a part of a distinguished set of communities. Whether they are based on your racial identity, shared interests, or common beliefs, some communities will be easier to adjust to from previous experiences. On top of those, however, are a bundle of new communities that you are entering. It’s important to consider that you are automatically entering the New York City community as well as your university community. With so many different spaces to belong to, Professor Rocco suggested starting with your homebase. Before going out and exploring the fashion scene in SoHo or checking out the artists down in Bushwick, consider getting to know your own campus first. Make the most of your orientation week and walk around the neighborhood that your campus resides in. It’s important to use this time to acclimate yourself as a college student first and a city resident second. 

A community I’ve found at Columbia, my end of the year Aikido Club practice in Central Park.
Taken on 35mm film.

 According to Professor Rocco,  engaging with a community is like engaging with any other relationship. Like relationships with people, you must dedicate time and understanding to advance them. You don’t marry someone after the first date, you take the time to assess their personality and your compatibility. The same logic can be applied to entering a new community! Beyond whether or not you share any common characteristics that would enhance your addition to the given community, your approach and intention are major factors that play a role in how well received your transition may be. In our conversation, Professor Rocco called attention to the privilege of being able to toss around phrases like “I want to get involved in the Harlem community.” She stressed the importance of entering communities with a curious and open mind as opposed to intervening with a goal/idea in mind. Deliberation and consideration on all aspects of this new relationship are essential in developing into a valuable and appreciated community member.

Internalizing and implementing all of these ideas can help determine whether or not your experience will be pleasant, additive, or accepted. New York City is densely populated and intricately regionalized, but by approaching communities like other relationships, you can find your community wherever you may end up.

By Thomas Stewart

Thomas currently attends Columbia University and plans to double major in creative writing and human rights. At Columbia Thomas is a staff writer for the City News section of the Columbia Daily Spectator, where he publishes articles that concern the West Harlem community. In his free time, you can find him practicing music or trying new vegetarian recipes

First impressions are everything when it comes to making new relationships. Get 20% off at Daniel’s Barbershop with student ID and coupon to look fresh and clean for any new relationships you encounter!

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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Posted in Friendship, NYC Student Guide, NYC Student Guide KickStarter Project, onCollege, onFun, onLife, Out On The Town, Outside Manhattan, Relationships, Student Issues, Uniqueness in NYC, University | No Comments »

Finding Safety In Your Situation

Thursday, June 13th, 2024

Planting my feet on Columbia University’s campus for the first time is an experience I will never forget. Before me was an oasis of grand buildings decorated with ancient names like Homer or Herodotus that I’d never heard before. Like many college freshmen in New York City, I was moving to a new place with what seemed like the entire world sprawled out before me. That feeling can be exhilarating at times, but daunting during others. Between all of the new faces, foods, and experiences you encounter, creating a community for yourself is a must when it comes to maintaining health and even sanity. At this pivotal moment in one’s life it’s crucial to find safety in your situation. 

A photo of Butler library, showing the engravings of Homer and Herodotus.
Taken on 35mm film.

Honestly, Columbia’s makeup inherently discourages a sense of community: Tucked away in Morningside Heights, the campus removes itself from the hustle and bustle of Midtown, Downtown, and even its neighboring Harlem community. Beyond physical barriers like gates, the Ivy League university maintains its competitive nature. I’ve had countless conversations with fellow classmates who complain of the competition to do well in class. In addition to NYC’s toxic “hustle culture”, Columbia students also experience the pressures of the classroom. This especially applies to students interested in the STEM field, where professors often limit the amount of “A” letter grades they give per section. This can lead to tense relationships between students and classmates, perpetuating an “every man for himself” mindset. Instead of cultivating a community of students that uplift each other, this culture can incite gatekeeping and standoffish attitudes. In my opinion, this is counterintuitive to the nature of a university. This is especially disappointing as Columbia boasts of its location at the intersection of thousands of different cultures and people. Columbia doesn’t always encourage a culture of community, but there is still opportunity for the student to engage with their surroundings! It would be a shame to close oneself off from all that the university has to offer socially, geographically, and intellectually. 

Though it may feel easy to shy away from the whirlwind of life that bustles outside of your dorm room, I argue that you have to intentionally form a safe space for yourself in college. The first few weeks of freshman year are incredibly formative. It’s such a beautiful time of life where most people have no expectations, no friends, and no curfew. Everyone is so open to meeting new people and trying new things. It’s important to lean into this social spirit that possesses everyone at the beginning of the year. The end goal isn’t to make lifelong friends, it’s simply helpful to have people to say “hi” to or invite out for adventures in the city. When you maintain a friendly and open mindset you’re fostering a more secure environment for yourself, and for the general community. Through this mindset, we can discard the idea that one must fail a class for another to pass it. While college is an inherently individualized experience, that doesn’t mean we have to face it alone. 

Forming circles of people with similar interests or characteristics are always a great place to start. Basic commonalities were instrumental in forming new friendships. For me, I was able to connect with other students who had just moved from California to New York. These friendships provided an outlet for me to express my homesickness to someone who understood what I was going through. At the same time, I was also learning more about new people and cultures. Most importantly, we were able to support each other during one of the biggest transitions of our lives through the things we had in common. 

A group photo of some of the friends I made freshman year.
Taken on 35mm film.

I can’t sit here and tell you to hunt down all of the people from your home state on the move-in day. What I’m suggesting is to start with what you know. Whether it be where you’re from, who you want to become, or how you got here, finding friends through basic commonalities is the kickstarter for maintaining sanity at college for the first time.

By Thomas Stewart

Thomas currently attends Columbia University and plans to double major in creative writing and human rights. At Columbia Thomas is a staff writer for the City News section of the Columbia Daily Spectator, where he publishes articles that concern the West Harlem community. In his free time, you can find him practicing music or trying new vegetarian recipes

Use this 10% off coupon for an more private dining experience with friends at Kyuramen. It’s walking distance from Columbia too!

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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Confessions of a People-Pleaser: On Advocating for your Needs and Boundaries

Monday, June 10th, 2024

There is no such a thing as someone with no needs and no boundaries. I used to believe I had none or at least no right to my own boundaries because I was placed in a role of mostly serving others. Specifically, many women are raised to believe this about themselves. And yet, many western cultures have this expectation that women still need to be these boss women with unbreakable spirits. I couldn’t reconcile these expectations before the time came for me to participate in a college lecture or start my first internship. 

I knew I had to dig deep within myself to find out why I had found it so challenging not to sacrifice myself for the needs of other people. To believe that I didn’t deserve to be listened to, helped, or have my identity affirmed as friendship coach Danielle Bayard Jackson loves to say. This was clearly impacting the quality of relationships I had with potential friends, my coworkers, family, and supervisors. And it was only blinding me from the potential I had of fulfilling my dreams and of living the kind of life I desired in the end. 

I mostly talk about boundary-setting with family in the second chapter of my ebook; but I would like to expand this conversation to include friends. Family is more or less our first introduction to how relationships are formed and how people view us. Some of us may have more chaotic families than others and follow scripts that strip us all of our autonomy, but they nevertheless serve as a blueprint for our friendships and other relationships important to us. 

As the eldest daughter in my family with two younger brothers, I was raised to constantly look after others, listen to their troubles, be available for when others had urgent matters to be taken care of, and always be open to visiting and being visited by other extended family members, even when the relationship was clearly one-sided. I grew accustomed to turning to journals and talking to myself to keep me away from the true feelings dying inside of me. And to still feel alive after a busy day of being a machine.

I’ll provide an example of a time I should have set boundaries with a “friend” in college. One woman approached me as I was waiting to meet with my advisor in the hallway. She seemed like the kind of person who was over-eager to talk to any new person she could find. I was surprised that she had ended up in my English Critical Theory class. From that point on, she always sat next to me, always asked me questions when the professor was speaking, called my phone several times in a row after class hours, and even plagiarized parts of an essay of mine. What looked like flattery in the beginning started to look more and more like obsession and jealousy (and she admitted to being jealous too). I should have told her that I clearly didn’t see her as a friend like she did. I should have let her know that she was exhausting me. I needed space, but because of the scripts I was fed as a eldest daughter, I willfully gave myself away to energy vampires like her.

Never been the most comfortable in front of a camera.

This was the script I carried with me into my young adulthood. I second-guessed my intellect during college lectures, which stopped me from participating. I felt guilty from wanting to lean on someone when I felt down because my supposed friends’ problems seemed more important, and I felt ashamed for ever using my free time because it was time I could have used to do more work at home or at the office. We all play roles in every aspect of our lives, but we have to decide what roles are depriving us of our humanity. How can we all get what we need without sacrificing ourselves and/or other people? That is my ultimate question. 

It requires a lonely journey to arrive at the answer simply because we live in a world that encourages us to treat each other like slot machines and less like humans. We all have a responsibility to show up for those we care about and hold them accountable when our boundaries have been crossed. Communicate openly and honestly, respect each other’s right to personal space, and learn the art of self-reliance because that will surely come in handy. It first starts with acknowledging we need things from others and learning to fulfill those needs in a healthy way.

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By Daeli Vargas

Daeli is a recent graduate from the City College of New York with a BA in English and a publishing certificate. She is from the Bronx and is very passionate about all things literary. She hopes one day to publish many books of her own and share her passions worldwide.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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Make New Friends But Keep The Old

Monday, June 3rd, 2024

As we grow older and move through different phases of life, maintaining long-standing friendships while nurturing new ones can be a delicate dance. Human beings are inherently social creatures and friendship is a natural response to everyday experiences. In order to survive, we form alliances. These bonds enrich our lives, providing support, joy, and a sense of belonging. Our social circles expand and contract as we navigate new schools, careers, moves, and other life changes. Finding friendship in every aspect of life enriches your experiences. 

As a rising junior in college I know the importance of having different social circles. I’ve come to see the value in each and every one of my friends and make it a priority to honor these relationships. Growing up, I went to public school in Virginia, in 8th grade I switched to a private school in the neighboring state of Maryland. When I first made the switch I was anxious to make new friends but also missed the companionship and familiarity of the people I grew up with. It was difficult to make myself available to both of my friend groups. I often had to choose between doing an activity with my neighborhood friends and accepting invitations to hangout with my new friends. As a result of wanting to fit in my new environment I felt myself prioritizing my new friendships over the old. Over time, I drifted further apart from the friends I had grown up with. I don’t blame myself for this because I think this was inevitable for my situation, I was thirteen and trying to throw myself into a social scene of people from a different state, people who had also grown up together. I believe focusing more time on building these relationships was necessary. Obviously, I would be growing closer to the people I was seeing everyday as opposed to friends I only had the chance to see on certain weekends.

However, I also made sure to invite my friends from my neighborhood to any party I hosted or dinner event I planned. In return, my friends from Virginia continued to invite me to their plans. Although our lives grew more separate, we were always able to pick up where we left off. I tried to align my social circles when I could by introducing both of my friend groups and giving them opportunities to bond. Even as a high school senior, I invited the friends I had gone to middle school with to my graduation party. While I had not seen them in months at the time of the party, they still attended because we mutually appreciated each other’s efforts to continue the relationship. 

Now, in college, we keep up with each other’s lives through social media and attend the same nightlife events when we’re home for breaks. I have even been able to connect my friends from middle school with my friends from high school who were attending the same colleges. My neighbor and best friend growing up is now roommates with one of my best friends from highscool because I connected them. There is no limit to the number of friends you can have, and bringing people together can build community. 

Through this experience, I’ve learned that relationship bonds can ebb and flow. Just because I don’t consider my middle school friends my best friends anymore but I will always be grateful for the time when we were closer. A distance is not an end. Changing relationship dynamics isn’t necessarily a bad thing; sometimes, it is just situational. It’s important that you remain conscious and attentive to how your various relationships are everchanging. Be attentive to change and make adjustments accordingly. Live by the saying, “A circle is round. It has no end. That’s how long I want to be your friend.”

My friends from middle and I in 7th grade, May 2017
My friends from middle school and I at my graduation party, May 2022
My favorite place for frozen yogurt in the city! So many great dietary options, flavors, and locations. This is a must- visit when you’re craving a sweet treat!

Hogan Bingel is a rising junior at NYU who plans to graduate in May 2026 with degrees in Journalism and Politics and a minor in The Business of Entertainment, Media, Technology, and Fashion. She grew up in Arlington, VA, outside of Washington, DC. She is home for the Summer and will be studying abroad in Florence during Fall 2024. For the time being, you can find her writing poetry, listening to vinyls, and planning her next travels.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  
At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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A 20-Something’s Thoughts on Romance

Friday, March 1st, 2024

When I was younger, I never pictured myself in a relationship. While I know now that the experience isn’t all that uncommon, it felt anything but normal at the time. Other girls my age talked about crushes and respective prince charmings with the kind of enthusiasm I could only struggle to understand. Why did they care so much? Why put so much energy into something that seemed to only make life more complicated? What exactly was it about being with someone that made the world so fixated on love? I didn’t get it and firmly believed that I would never get it. That was, at least, until Ethan. 

I can’t say that it was love at first sight, nor could I say that the world stopped around us like so many movies before us did. But to quote a writer I enjoyed when I first met Ethan, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once. There’s a reason John Green is still proud of that line. Nothing else could describe the way it all happened so perfectly. He was someone I knew, then someone I admired, a friend who became a close friend, my best friend even, the best person I ever met, and then finally the only person I could see spending my life with. Slowly, and then all at once. I gradually got to know him, shared his interests and his jokes, and then suddenly he was all I could think about. 

Image Credit: https://unsplash.com/photos/two-person-holding-papercut-heart-4le7k9XVYjE?utm_content=creditShareLink&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash

I think Hollywood often has it all wrong concerning love, at least when it comes to real love in the modern age. The grand theatrics of old classics are alluring, after all, who wouldn’t want to be chosen over a lavish fortune or whisked away to untold adventure? Who wouldn’t want a Prince Charming? But the reality is that even Prince Charming’s palace will crumble if its foundation is lacking. Your partner could show up at your doorstep with as many roses as you like, but if you can’t hold an everyday conversation, what’s the point?

I believe that at its core, love is built upon a foundation of trust and understanding. Without these fundamental elements, even the most passionate relationships can falter. Trust forms the bedrock upon which love flourishes, without it you leave space for insecurity and imbalance. Understanding cultivates empathy and compassion so that partners to connect on a deeper level and navigate challenges with grace. Moreover, love thrives on balance, compromise, and care. It requires a delicate equilibrium where each partner’s needs are considered and respected, fostering a sense of equality and harmony. Romance is important in love, but relationships are so much more complicated than that. To insinuate anything else would be to insult the human spirit. After all, the only thing more complex than one human being is the connection between two.

It’s been nearly eight years since I met Ethan with us being a rare example of rather functional high school sweethearts. We’ve had countless dates, arguments, and rounds of all major holidays including the three-month gauntlet I have to go through to cover Christmas, his birthday, and Valentine’s Day all in a row. In all that time, I can firmly say without a hint of doubt that while we’ve grown together, we’ve also grown to understand what was really important when it came to maintaining a relationship. At least as much as humanly possible. In essence, love flourishes when trust, understanding, balance, compromise, and care are woven together to create a strong and resilient bond and I learned all that with Ethan by my side.

Students get 20% off at Bonchon.

By Isabella Bosso

Isabella is a junior Comics student at the School of Visual Arts and a self-described nerd shut-in. She grew up in Garfield, New Jersey and you can find her curled up with her dog playing the latest RPG with her boyfriend.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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The Universal Language of International Students

Tuesday, October 10th, 2023

Prior to arriving in Dublin, I hadn’t really processed or identified with the idea that I was going to be an international student. Coming from the United States, I recognized that studying in another country that is English-speaking and heavily influenced by American culture is probably not as intense of an experience as studying somewhere that is entirely foreign in both language and culture. However, I quickly came to realize that, even in less obviously foreign places, there are many experiences shared among all international students.

The first example, and perhaps the one that is most difficult to get used to, is the time difference between school and home. Everyone struggles at least a little with homesickness when they go to college for the first time, but there is truly nothing like an 8-hour time difference to throw you into the reality of adulthood. The first few days at school felt a little unreal, but eventually it set in that I wouldn’t be in the same time zone as the rest of my family for another 3-4 months. 

Something that made the experience especially difficult for me was having a boyfriend back home. With busy schedules on both of our ends, and having spent much of the summer together, it was extremely difficult at first to transition to only calling once or twice a week and having the majority of our conversations being just words on a screen. While our communication has strengthened since we first started long-distance, it would be a lie to say it isn’t still difficult to feel such a constant disconnect between us in our periods apart.

What I can say worked best for me to ease the sadness that the distance brings was meeting and spending time with people at school who are going through the same thing. I like to think of it as a sort of universal language between all international students – the homesickness, the struggle to adapt, the stresses of learning how to succeed academically and socially all while in a near completely unfamiliar place. I have found that no matter where other international students come from, there are always things we can relate to each other about over what we have experienced in this new location.

One resource that has been especially helpful to me at Trinity College is the Global Room. The Global Room is a place where many international students can take refuge to ask questions, attend informational events, and even celebrate the holidays of their home countries. One of the first times I visited the Global Room was a Thanksgiving party (a holiday I definitely didn’t realize I’d be going without for a few years). There, I was able to meet many fellow Americans and bond over some familiar holiday foods and gratitude activities.

A craft I did through the Global Room!

I’ve also learned about other cultures through a variety of Global Room events, such as an Irish trivia night and a Teru Teru Bozu-making class (Japanese rain dolls). There is something quite special about bonding with other international students over a shared lack of knowledge about the new place you’re in. Many of my first conversations with my current closest friends revolved around the unpredictable Dublin bus schedules and the expensive prices of toiletry products at Tesco. Even better, as you broaden your network of international friends, you in turn get to learn more about where they are from and what their lives are like back home. 

Overall, whether you are an international student or not, I think there is much room for bonding and meeting people over the shared unfamiliarities of university. Maybe you have the same boring professor, or you’re both struggling to finish the same assignment. Instead of lingering in the difficult and frustrating parts of the college experience, you can use them as opportunities to seek out positive relationships, which will help you further down the road in navigating your path.

Summary:

  • Being an international student can add further difficulties to navigating university life
  • I struggled with the time difference between school and home, especially with having a boyfriend back home
  • Making connections with other international students helped me feel more grounded in my new community
  • The Global Room was a helpful resource to meet more international students and learn more about Irish culture
  • Anyone, international student or not, can form new friendships through bonding over shared struggles
Save on your next grocery trip with this coupon and your student ID!

By Bella Littler

Bella is a second year film student within the Trinity College Dublin / Columbia Dual BA program. She grew up in Iowa, but is currently living and studying in Dublin. On the average day, you can find her watching obscure movies, going on aimless walks around the city, or raving about any and all Taylor Swift lyrics.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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Posted in Family, Friendship, onLife, onLove, onValues, Relationships, University | No Comments »

Chapter 4: Major Decision (Literally)

Monday, October 9th, 2023

The thought of having to figure out what I wanted to do for the rest of my life at the young age of 18 nauseated me daily. It pissed me off so much that at such a young age we are expected to know exactly what our future is supposed to look like, that in my college essay I essentially ranted about how it is all such bullshit.

Pace allowed students to go into their freshman year with an undecided major, so that’s what I did. I knew I loved writing, but to do that for the rest of my life seemed like such a daunting thing and I still had no idea what I would do with writing and how I’d make money. I also enjoyed psychology and liked the idea of pursuing that, but then also liked the idea of pursuing film. Overall, I’m an indecisive Gemini and figured going in undecided and trying out a bunch of different classes would be the best option.

My first semester schedule consisted of a lot of gen-ed classes like most freshman year classes. Almost all of my classes in the first semester were online because of COVID, so it was difficult bonding with professors, meeting my classmates, and genuinely finding a connection with  any of the classes. But, like I’ve mentioned in the past few chapters, my extroverted roommate helped me find some friends.

Through her, I found one of my best friends Jill. Jill and I are very similar in some ways, but also very different in a way that I think helps us balance each other out. For example, when I met Jill, she had this whole plan of being an English major and going into Pace’s Masters program in publishing. At the time, I had no idea what any of this meant, but I knew I was impressed with her ambition and dedication.

Jill helped me find my voice and feel more confident about my writing. I still wasn’t positive with what I wanted to do with my future, but I felt like I was getting closer to something.


Jill, Nellie, and I on Halloween our Freshman year

Together, Jill and I would host “writing nights” and spend hours writing together. Whether it was a creative piece we were working on or homework, we always motivated each other to work hard. Jill had reignited my love for writing that I forgot I had, and we would end up writing until like three in the morning most nights.

I cannot stress enough how important it is to find friends with similar hobbies as you. When working together, it makes your work stronger. Even though Jill and I would be working on separate projects, we were still able to help each other and read over each other’s work. By doing these writing nights together, Jill would help me figure out what I wanted with my future. I knew that if my future looked anything like it looks now, I would be happy.

Knowing that I was happy with what I was doing, Jill encouraged me to discuss English majors with different professors. I ended up finding Pace’s new Writing and Rhetoric program and it felt like a dream come true. All of the professors were super helpful and understanding and I finally felt like I could do something I enjoyed in my classes.

Like I said before, I encourage getting to know people with the same hobbies as you and the same major as you. Even though Jill and I weren’t really in the same major at the time, we had similar interests and I was able to learn more about Pace’s programs. She helped me find the courage to declare a major and stood with me the entire time.

Now we’re in our senior year together and we even work together! My entire experience at Pace would not be the way it is today without my friend Jill.


Jill and I our sophomore year freaking out after the new Spiderman movie

Summary:

  • I didn’t know what to do when I got to school
  • I was stressed about declaring a major
  • I found a friend with similar interests as me
  • My friend helped me discover my major and my passion for writing
Enjoy your own study/writing night with friends and 15% off pizza with this coupon and Student I.D.!

By Mia Ilie

Mia Ilie is a student at Pace University, graduating in May 2024 with a degree in Writing and Rhetoric and a focus on publishing. She grew up in Rockland, New York and is currently living in Westchester, New York where she attends school and works at a local bookstore. You can always find her with her nose in a book or screaming to Taylor Swift with her friends.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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Chapter 2: Beware! Dating in College

Wednesday, October 4th, 2023

Image Credit: http://7-themes.com/6982809-envelope-lipstick-kiss.html

They love me, they love me not, they love me, they love me not… Although a game introduced to most of us before we could truly comprehend the complexities of love and relationships, it still has its bearing on our lives today, even as college students. Love and relationships are one of the many components of college we fit into our hectic schedules. Along with school, jobs, and friendships, relationships have a strong bearing on the direction of our college lives.

College is an epicenter of stress, laughs, anxiety, tears, and every other emotion possible for a human being; we all know this. Throwing a dating life into the mix is like tossing a handful of glitter onto the already chaotic canvas of our emotions, creating a kaleidoscope of joyous highs and woeful lows!

 I can remember how infatuated I became with the person I was talking to. I told my friends, my family, and anyone who would listen, even though there was no level of commitment to one another (rookie mistake, I know). I remember feeling butterflies when his name would pop up on my phone, texting my friends saying that he and I are something special (not the first time this has happened). I had stayed up at night waiting for some semblance that I was noticed, that I was liked. When I eventually woke up in the morning, that same excitement carried over. I started to sleep with my phone right next to me, left my ringer on, and gaslit myself that I didn’t care when in reality, I was elated. It’s normal to feel excited about current and potential relationships, but not enough to side-track your life. 

It feels good to be wanted, great even, but not at the expense of your well-being! There was a particular experience during my college dating journey that brought the importance of honesty into sharp focus. During the early stages of one relationship, I found out that my partner hadn’t been entirely forthcoming about the people they were talking to, one of whom happened to be a friend I knew.  

This sparked a myriad of feelings, none of which were pleasant. Confusion, disgust, betrayal, to name a few. It was difficult to think that this actually happened to me. You see this in a movie, used to heighten the plot of some cheesy teenage rom-com, but my life is no Netflix special. I didn’t want drama, I didn’t want some confusing, dramatic climax as part of my “movie,” so what was happening? 

Following this, I spoke with friends and family to ask the all too familiar question: why me? Almost every answer I received varied slightly from one another, all along the lines of “dump him!” I had hoped they would say something more promising, like “they don’t mean anything to one another; they are just friends,” but me and my naive optimism were soon crushed into the ground.  

If I can relay any advice to you that I gained from this tumultuous chapter of my love life, it would be two things: maintain your independence and learn from your experiences. While this might not have been a successful relationship for me, I still gained perspective from it, one that I can apply perspective relationships. Maintaining your independence in college isn’t solely about pursuing your interests and dreams; it’s also about safeguarding your sense of self within a relationship. Your individuality and aspirations are just as important while in a partnership. Remember that even relationships that don’t go as planned are valuable learning experiences (we are in college, after all). Whether they last a lifetime or a season, each relationship is a classroom for personal growth. Reflect on your experiences, both the successes and the setbacks, and use that insight to guide your journey in future relationships. Not every relationship will end with an amicable breakup or meeting your soulmate, and that’s okay. In the end, it falls back to yet another saying we all heard as kids: if you fall down, you dust your knees and get back up (or something along those lines). 

Key points:

  • It’s natural to feel excited in a relationship, but it’s vital not to let it consume your life entirely. Over-focusing on someone can lead to neglecting your own well-being and other important aspects of your life.
  • Every relationship, regardless of its outcome, provides valuable lessons. Take time to reflect on both the successes and setbacks. Use these experiences as guides for your future relationships, helping you make wiser choices.
  • Relationships don’t always have a perfect ending. It’s essential to accept the challenges and setbacks as a normal part of life. Just like the childhood saying, when you face obstacles, acknowledge them, learn from them, and then continue your journey with newfound wisdom.
Whether you’re on a first date or consoling a broken heart, head over to Caffé Bene to get a discount on a delicious treat.

By Juliana Capasso

Juliana Capasso is a junior at Boston University studying Film and Television & Public Relations. Outside of her academic responsibilities, she spends her time exploring the city with friends, reading, listening to music, and journaling. 

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful ebooks, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2023.

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Chapter 1: Where Do I Go Next?

Monday, September 18th, 2023

The date is October 4th, 2019. Just a few months before we’re forced to remain inside our homes and the only way we would talk to our friends would be through a screen.

I was a senior in high school and freaking out every day about where the hell I should go to college, what I would major in, or if I should even go to college because the idea of not living in the same vicinity as my dog was terrifying (note to self: after four years it is still very difficult not being with my dog everyday).


Me and my dog Coco graduating high school! (We have a co-dependent relationship)

I knew that the best decision would be to go to school because if I stayed back home while all my friends moved on, my already not great mental health would get even worse. So, with that in mind, I spent almost all of my free time researching different colleges, debating how far I should go, and deciding if I should actually listen to my mother when she said I would prefer a smaller campus compared to a big one. I was 17 so naturally that teenage angst told me that my mom didn’t know what she was talking about. Now at 21, I realize she knew exactly what she was talking about. Further proof that mother’s always know best, but that’s not the topic right now.

By the time application season rolled around, I had applied to about five or six schools with two schools on the top of my list. One was a school in Massachusetts that I visited once and thought was cute and despite being far from home, was still close to one of my brothers who lives in Massachusetts. The other school was Pace University, only thirty minutes from home with an alternate city campus if I wanted to go further.

On October 4th, 2019 I went on a tour that I didn’t know then, but would ultimately be the tour that made my decision to go to this school.

It started off as a regular tour with the generic tour guide claiming this is the best school ever while walking backwards and constantly reassuring the parents that this is the safest campus in New York and your child will be taken care of. Needless to say, I was bored out of my mind waiting for the tour to end so the actual fun part would begin.

I had a family friend who always felt like a sibling to me at this school who would give me the actual realistic tour and let me hang out in their dorm while my mom went to watch the baseball game (coincidentally my stepbrother’s school was playing against Pace that day). Together my friend and I walked around campus, sat in the dining hall (I took a bite of the french fries, they weren’t great but there’s a McDonald’s down the street), hung out with some of their friends, and then went back to their dorm to watch stupid YouTube videos. You know, the routine of almost every college student.

On December 10th, 2019, I got the acceptance letter to Pace University. By January 2020 I had heard back from all the schools I applied to and got into both of my top picks. I had no idea how I was going to make this decision because I struggle just deciding what I’m going to eat for lunch, so figuring out the next four years felt impossible. But, thankfully, my mom told me we could visit both schools again just to get a feel for each. I was hoping I could get a more personal tour of my second school so I could compare it to the one I got from Pace. However, before I got a chance to do so, we were locked into our homes.

Being a class of 2020 student affected me more than I thought it would. If it wasn’t for COVID, I honestly couldn’t say I’d be in the same position I’m in currently. When decision day came in I reflected on both schools and knew that Pace was the place for me. I already had a distinguished relationship with someone I trusted and knew that would help me find the courage to break out of my shell in school.


Me and my friend Cayleigh this past summer in 2023

With this friend close by, I could contact them for any questions I had, felt encouraged to actually go out, and just genuinely have someone there for me when needed. I’m forever so grateful to this friend for all they have done for me and I hope one day I can return the big favor they’ve done for me. (Hey Cayleigh, if you’re reading this, let’s go get some drinks with our moms and I’ll tell you how much I love you again).

Positive relationships are so beneficial not just for your mental health, but physical health as well. Better Health Channel’s website has a blog about how relationships help lower one’s anxiety and depression, which was something I was worried would worsen when going to college. I had already struggled with my mental health for years beforehand and going into an unknown school not knowing anyone would definitely affect my anxiety. Thanks to this existing relationship, my overall mood was significantly better as was my confidence in getting to know people.


Me the day I moved into my dorm in August 2020

In August of 2020 I finally moved into my first dorm at Pace University after several facetimes and conversations with my roommate. By then I had two established relationships that ultimately made my first week at my new school exciting rather than terrifying.Having a connection with someone can make new challenges in your life more enjoyable which it ultimately did for me.

Summary:

  • I had been struggling for a while about what college I should go to but thanks to my friendship with a student at Pace it made my decision easier.
  • I was a senior in high school during 2020, so I was in lockdown when trying to figure out which college I should commit to
  • This friendship made my confidence about entering a new stage in my life much better and lead me to not being afraid to reach out to new people (Including my roommate I mentioned at the end)
Every college student needs to stay caffeinated! Enjoy a free iced coffee with the purchase of any sandwich! Make sure to bring coupon and student ID!

By Mia Ilie

Mia Ilie is a student at Pace University, graduating in May 2024 with a degree in Writing and Rhetoric and a focus on publishing. She grew up in Rockland, New York and is currently living in Westchester, New York where she attends school and works at a local bookstore. You can always find her with her nose in a book or screaming to Taylor Swift with her friends.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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“You’ve Got a Friend in Me” (As Long as You’re Vaccinated)

Monday, August 22nd, 2022

As you get older, you learn a lot about relationships, be they familial, platonic, romantic, professional, or anything in between. High school is where you think you hit your stride in this department, since you start to become more independent and have many more choices to make; you are both physically and metaphorically in the driver’s seat more than you have been in your whole life. Making friends is also super convenient, as most of the people you are close with live no more than ten miles from your house and you see them every day at school. Minimal effort required.

But then once you graduate and enter your twenties, you realize there’s a reason that sitcoms focus on this age group—it’s the time in your life where you’re constantly trying to find your way in the world and relate to the people around you. All of your friends and family (probably) don’t live around the corner anymore, so it’s on you to forge those new connections. College plays a big role in this growing process because never in your life will you have as much freedom, but also as much confusion, as you do in those four years.

Freshman year of college is a particularly unique time because it feels like all the different realms of your life are trying to collapse in on each other. You’re trying to keep in touch with your friends from high school, you’re trying to make sure your family doesn’t feel isolated, and all the while, you’re trying to make new friends in a completely new environment. Being from Massachusetts and going to school at Villanova, I felt far removed from everyone I had grown up with, which was both a little bit sad and exciting. On one hand, I was wishing that I had chosen a school closer to home so I could cling to that sense of familiarity, and on the other, I was happy to be somewhere that felt completely my own where I could push myself outside of my comfort zone. After the first semester, I was feeling good about the friends that I was making both inside and outside of my dorm, and I felt like I was finally starting to see this new place as my home.

One such friend: my roommate of four years who recently came to visit me in MA over the summer. Shout out to any fellow Pirate’s Cove mini-golf enthusiasts.

Then, you know, this cute little thing called COVID-19 came along, and it became a rather tumultuous time in our collective sitcom eras. Less laugh tracks, more laments.

I started to wonder what would happen to those relationships I had been cultivating those first two semesters—would they survive a global pandemic? When we came back to school (at that point—if we came back to school at all) how would things be different from the first time I saw my peers? And what would happen to the people I was friends with from my town, where even the ten-mile radius felt so far away during quarantine? Everything was so uncertain, and those first few months of the pandemic were some of the loneliest months of my life. Stuck in my house, not able to see extended family members, high school friends, or college friends. But maintaining relationships and keeping people who are important to you in your life takes effort, and this period of our lives was perhaps the greatest test of who you would remain close with and who you might unfortunately grow apart from.

The rules of relationships also seemed to be changing to align with the health crisis we were living through. I was always incredibly nervous about COVID, both contracting and spreading it, so I took every precaution seriously to minimize putting myself and my loved ones at risk. When the spread began to slow and we could start seeing people outside of quarantine, the most important thing for me was to make sure their boundaries were respected. Are they okay hanging out with no masks? Would they prefer to be outside where we could socially distance? Would it be easier to do something or go somewhere that required wearing masks so we wouldn’t even have to debate it? It was great when vaccines started rolling out and we were able to better protect ourselves, but these questions never really went away. Ironically, despite being very cautious, last winter I still got one of my best friends sick after texting her that “I only have a little bit of a stuffy nose, I definitely don’t think it’s COVID” before hanging out with her. Guess what it was!

The text message that did not age well.

Though I would never be upset or mad with someone who accidentally exposed me to COVID and got me sick, I still felt a lot of guilt over just the potential of getting anyone sick. My friend was very reassuring about the whole thing, so it helped to ease the burden of what I was feeling. 

Maintaining relationships during COVID was difficult to say the least, but it taught me a lot about how you should treat people. From my perspective, the two most important parts of a relationship of any kind are respect and trust. Many people had different comfort levels when it came to the pandemic, so it was necessary to respect when people maybe didn’t want to hang out or wanted to take an abundance of caution to make sure that everyone felt safe. We had to trust that those close to us were wearing their masks, not going to unnecessary “super-spreader” events, and were getting vaccinated when they could. And ultimately, when those around us were sick, we needed to be supportive of them and do our best to be there for them.

These are of course not lessons that are exclusive to a pandemic but have instead been strengthened by it. In fact, it should not have taken a pandemic for us to figure out that we need to be kind and considerate of others, but nonetheless, here we are. And after all of those precautions, the COVID scares within networks of people, and the months of general struggle, I’ve come to realize that what I look for the most in relationships is being around people who make me feel comfortable. I strive to be that person for others, and I would encourage you to do the same, as it will go a long way in building meaningful connections with people.

Hopefully Randy Newman would agree.

Nothing says friendship like paintball, so be sure to check out this coupon!

By: Katie Reed

Katie Reed is a senior at Villanova University studying English and Communication. She is in utter disbelief that she just admitted to being a senior. She loves to read, but has made barely a dent in the increasingly large pile of books on her bookshelf that she told herself she would read this summer. She hopes to enter a career in the editing and publishing industry.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services. At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

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