Coming to college is starting from scratch—an exciting, sometimes nerve-wracking, chapter of life filled with possibility. Whether you’re attending a school close to home or heading off to a new city, college offers a fresh start. And before you’ve even found your footing, the pressure to find your new best friends can be overwhelming. Lucky for you, this pressure is universal, and you are far from alone.
Those first few weeks on campus are nonetheless crucial for laying the groundwork for new friendships. Everyone is adjusting, finding their classes, navigating dorm life, and figuring out where the best coffee is. During this time, people are especially open to meeting others, so be sure to take advantage.
Go to orientation events, campus tours, welcome mixers, and even cheesy icebreaker activities. These are designed to help you meet people and start conversations. You never know; your future best friend might be your accomplice in sneaking into the succulent planting welcome event that you never got off the waitlist for. That might sound oddly specific, but that is precisely how I made my first, and closest, friend here.
We met in the first week before classes had even started, but it was only once we found ourselves appearing at the same social events time and time again that we became close. We started to realize all of our shared interests, from cafe-hopping to art museums, and just like that I had found a partner in crime. It is with her, my friend Ambika, that I met my other now roommate Taylor, and we quickly became a nearly inseparable unit.

It will likely happen like this, if it hasn’t already, for you as well. You have to be open to the opportunity, but the right acquaintances will, with both rapid speed and gradual commitment, become family. So maybe keep your headphones out at the school bookstore, compliment that girl’s jacket, and dive into a conversation about how you both love thrifting. Let the world in, and I guarantee the rest will fall into place.
Join clubs, sports teams, or student organizations that interest you. Whether it’s an intramural volleyball league, the school newspaper, or a club for people who love baking, getting involved is a fantastic way to meet people with shared interests. These groups give you a natural space to interact and bond without the pressure of having to “make friends” on the spot.
You also don’t need a big circle of friends. In fact, it’s often better to focus on forming a few genuine connections. Meet as many people as you can handle, but don’t feel pressured to sustain all of these relationships. If you click with someone- great! Follow -up, grab coffee, and invite them on outings or to group hangouts. If you are finding it difficult to deepen a friendship, try stepping back and directing that energy towards expanding your network or fostering other connections you’ve made.
Remember, friendships take time to grow. You might not find “your people” in the first week or even the first month, and that’s okay. Keep showing up. Keep reaching out. Be open to different ideas and perspectives, and talk to as many people as possible.
Reinventing yourself in college can be exciting, especially when you’re in a new environment. While growth is a natural part of the process, try not to lose sight of who you are. The strongest bonds come from a foundation of authenticity. Let people get to know the real you—the you that loves photography, longs to travel, despises techno music, and has strong opinions about politics.
Vulnerability is scary, especially when you don’t know anyone yet and you don’t want to close any doors. But being honest invites others to do the same, and in turn allows you to filter out the people who were never meant to stay in your life.
You will also feel lonely at times, especially in the beginning, when your family is done helping you unpack and you’re left sitting in your dorm room alone. This is all a part of the process. Everyone experiences moments of homesickness, anxiety, or awkwardness during the transition. It’s not only normal but expected. I assure you, it will pass. But, in the meantime, reach out for comfort—turn to a roommate or call a hometown friend.
College is about so much more than academics. It’s about the relationships you build, the memories you make, and the people who will shape your journey. Friendships will evolve over time. Some will be short-lived, others lifelong. All of them will teach you something.
So take that first step. Say hello. Sit down at a new table, because you never know who will be sitting across from you.

By Logan O’Connor
Logan is a rising senior at NYU pursuing degrees in Journalism and Politics. She grew up on Long Island, but always dreamed of living in New York City. When she’s not in class or at her favorite local cafe, you can find her wandering the city (film camera in hand) or baking up a storm in her kitchen.
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