“The Chippery” sounds like an industrial horror of the Victorian age, a place where child laborers chip away at rocks with pickaxes while being whipped by slavemasters for hours until all the strength leaves their tiny little bodies and they’re hauled away to uncomfortable cots where the dust in their lungs leads them to convalesce with pneumonia throughout the dark, terrible night, upon which that bugle sounds the coming of dawn and they are woken up to repeat the same thing all over again. But actually it’s a place that serves fried fish.

The restaurant itself is cozy but very small. There’s just one tiny table in the corner and it seems like you’re supposed to order out. The staff are very nice people, though I’d imagine they could get a little claustrophobic.

The menu had deep-fried oreos but if I eat any more oreos I would die, so instead I got the calamari.

Once again, the calamari is a combination of tentacle segments and whole small squids, with a lot more of the latter than usual. The batter is nice and crunchy and the pieces at the bottom aren’t soggy which is pretty rare. The flavor is subtle, but it goes well with the provided sauce even if it isn’t my thing.

The fried fish itself is extremely fried, with a very thick layer of crunchy batter. It tastes very good but is somewhat cumbersome to actually eat due to the way it’s curled on itself, meaning that it’s hard to cut without accidentally tearing off a large portion of the skin. Fortunately both the fish and batter taste good on their own. The eponymous chips are apparently made with a secret flavor, which I can’t actually describe the taste of under threat of legal action. The chips themselves are good, crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside. I’d recommend scraping some of the seasoning off them onto the fish.

Verdict: 8/10 Matthew Calamari indictments

By: Alexander Rose

Alexander Rose studies satire at NYU Gallatin and wishes he was actually just Oscar Wilde. He is interested in writing, roleplaying games, and procrastination. Describing himself in the third person like this makes him feel weird.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.

Here we are, May 19th. Exactly 7 days after May 4th, just like I promised in the last entry of the Covid Cooking Club. To celebrate fact that Covid is now 100% not a threat and nobody should ever worry about it even a little bit, I will be commencing the Rapid Revival Restaurant Reviews, to drum up some support for those poor small business owners who were already going to get destroyed by corporate competition but we’re pretending it’s the pandemic’s fault now. My first target will be the seafood restaurant Bait and Hook, chosen for no other reason than that it was close to me and I’m very lazy.

The layout of the restaurant is very nice, somewhat nautically themed but not nautically themed enough to make people seasick. which apparently happens sometimes. The lights are red, which is pretty weird because it didn’t seem like that kind of establishment. All the waiters are very nice, even when I got pissed at them for not letting me in when I turned up an hour early without any sort of identification. The only real problem is the noise: the music is loud, the people are loud, and the acoustics make it all louder, which means you’ll probably have to shout your order if you want the waiter to actually listen to you.

The house lager is good, and I say that as someone who doesn’t even like beer. As far as I’m concerned most alcohol that isn’t hard cider tastes like varying flavors of fizzy urine, but fortunately this one bucked that trend. It has a mild taste that could be compared to wood if wood tasted good. It also completely obliterated my nostrils after the gas came back up and made me feel like I had been tear gassed, but in a fun and relaxed way.

The Kung Pao Calamari is very tasty. It has both tentacle bits and entire tiny octopi for variety. They’re decently crispy and taste great even without sauce thanks to the seasoning. I tried some of the Kung Pao sauce and it tasted like someone had Kung Powed my tongue, but I guess some people like that sort of thing.

Their most popular food was the lobster roll, which I didn’t order because I don’t like lobster rolls. I had the fish and chips instead. The fish itself was great: white cod with a taste distinct from other fried fish without being too overpowering. The skin was both crunchy and stayed on the meat, and it’s rare to find a fried fish that does both of those. The fries were… fine. Not crispy enough to be french fries or thick enough to be steak fries. I saw someone else eating mashed potatoes and those looked way better.

So the next day I went back and ordered the mashed potatoes. They were, in fact, way better. A good blend between chunky and creamy with a hint of garlic. I also learned it was much less loud outside.

Dessert was gelato, which wasn’t part of the review but they gave me some anyway because they’re nice people. It was good, because it was ice cream. I’m easily please by ice cream.

Verdict: 7.75/10 happy British fish.

(The coupon image is currently broken so just pretend it’s here and go to https://www.campusclipper.com/new/popup1.php?CUP_COD=3047)

By: Alexander Rose

Alexander Rose studies satire at NYU Gallatin and wishes he was actually just Oscar Wilde. He is interested in writing, roleplaying games, and procrastination. Describing himself in the third person like this makes him feel weird.

For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourages them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing, and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during the Welcome Week of 2015.