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College Concerns and Worries

Wednesday, September 5th, 2012

As young adults, we are prone to taking a “trial and error” approach to life. We know one of the many goals associated with college is the promise of a better life. We also know getting through college is a mission itself, filled with all types of twists and turns we never see coming. Here are a couple of concerns you may or may not have experienced, and some pretty good solutions to help keep your stress leveled.

 

Finances

 

Money will always be a major issue. Unless you hit the lottery or were born into royalty, you’re probably counting every penny you spend. Everything from getting to school to the afternoon snack craving can become a problem.

As college students we tend to want to blow our money on the first things we can think of. Saving is a minimal priority. HelpSaveMyDollars.com’s creator Scott Gamm developed a theory stating fifty percent of college students have 4 or more credit cards. An even more shocking statistic is that eighty percent of students fail to pay off their credit card bill.

The key is to keep an eye on your money and always track what you are spending. I’ve written an article entitled “College Savings Doesn’t Mean College Boredom” in which I talk about having fun in New York the cheapest way possible.

 

 

Social Life

Balancing school and anything else can prove to be quite complicated. Whether it’s a job or an internship, you will find you don’t have much time for anything else. Twenty three percent of full-time undergrads, who are 24 or younger, work 20 hours or more a week. With hours like that plus the 15 hours or more you plan to spend in classes and on after class activities (labs and group projects anyone?), you won’t have much time for anything else.

Although having any kind of social life can seem like an extra burden, it’s not impossible and is more than healthy for a college student. Someone paying you a visit after you come home from work is one way that comes to mind (because you know . . . you’ll be too tired to go out and all). Someone can come meet you at your job after your shift. Meeting people at school is also a good way to kill two birds with one stone. Trust me . . . you’ll be spending A LOT of time with these people, so you might as well get to know them. You might like them.

 

Professors

 

We’ve all heard it before, “I have to take Professor (place name here). He’s an easy A” or “I don’t want Professor (alchy). He’s always drunk.”

Okay . . . maybe the last one is just me, but you get the idea.

There are those out there who simply don’t care who ends up teaching them a specific course, but for many of us, there’s that one professor that just gets us. Early registration is the key to getting the professors you want, the classes you want, at the times you want to take them. Some schools even give you cash stipends for early registration, which is even more of an incentive.

Personally, I never understood math until I had this one professor. She never let me (or anyone for that matter) leave class until she was sure we understood the material. This may seem like torture but I didn’t fail a test that whole semester . . . . . So I guess it worked, at least in my case

 

Personal Problems

 

We all have lives outside of college and many times it’s hard for our personal issues to not get in the way. Students with children have to constantly worry about their kid as it will always be one of their top priorities. Students can be involved in relationships that just swallow up their time (and if this is you, you should really learn how to prioritize) among other things.

I’ve been in three different living situations ever since I started school and I’m working on a fourth and hopefully my last for a while. Going to school and not knowing if I’ll even have a home to come back to has definitely been one of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my life. All the “stay focused” and “keep your eyes on the prize” speeches never made any sense until I reached this period in my life.

Even though life can overwhelm you at times, it is important to know why you enrolled in this first place. It’s easy to forget why we started on this journey when all the unnecessary crap is constantly thrown in our face. Whatever the issue is, it’s important to know you have the strength, the tools and the support to get through whatever you’re going through. Also, you ARE working towards a better future and that’s more than most people can say.

 

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Carlos L., Monroe College. Read my blog!!  Follow me on Twitterand Facebook :)

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Posted in Friendship, NYC Student Guide, onCollege, onEntertainment, onFun, onLife, onLove, onNews, onSavings, Roommates, Studying | No Comments »

Going Out in the City on a College Budget: Five Whys and Five Hows

Tuesday, August 21st, 2012

Growing up, going to “the city” (that is, New York City) meant dressing up in whatever dress I wore for Easter Sunday or Christmas Eve and going out to dinner at a Zagat-rated restaurant somewhere in Little Italy with my family.  In those days, Mom and Dad paid.  When I first moved to the city from Westchester four years ago, going out meant throwing on a shirt and skirt in hopes of looking somewhat decent on the line of an overhyped 18+ club that I or my roommates were “on the list” for, thanks to a Facebook group that boasted to keep us up-to-date on the hottest and cheapest NYC college-age nightlife.  I quickly denied the existence of such a life.

pitfalls of fake IDs

When I turned twenty-one, I retired my once-used, two-years-expired fake ID that flaunted the image of a girl who looks absolutely nothing like me except for the fact that we are both 5’4” and have brown hair and brown eyes. At 5PM on my twenty-first birthday, I entered a heavenly paradise: Trader Joe’s Wine Shop.  Knowing that I would, without a doubt, be carded there, I stood on line with two bottles of Three-Buck-Chuck and my awkward but somehow freeing sixteen-year-old smile staring at me from my driver’s license.

When it comes to going out, the city has much to offer besides Trader Joe’s Wine Shop.  Bars are everywhere, nightclubs are plentiful, and parties often literally happen in the streets and under them in the subways.  Having gone to Manhattan for college, I was faced with the challenge of the city in addition to traditional college distractions.  Still, I believe that the ups outnumber and outweigh the downs when it comes to the typical college student’s desire to celebrate the weekend, weekday, or lack of knowing what day it is.

  1. You can leave your apartment without a set destination.  Don’t know where to go?  Just go.  Look for “two for one” signs.  Follow crowds.  Gravitate towards noise.  Ask loud people you cross on the street where they just came from and hope they remember.
  2. You meet people (whether you want to or not).  Though you may unwillingly find out about a stranger’s hygiene, astrological sign, and pick-up techniques, you may also make some new friends or at least go home with an interesting story or characters for that screenplay you’ve been working on.
  3. You don’t have to designate a driver.  Subways, taxis, and sidewalks are a New Yorker’s best friends.  Because few people going to college in the city have a car with them, there is no need to draw straws at the beginning of the night (though you may want to designate a pack leader to lead the way home if you’re sleepily returning at three in the morning).

    Designate your shoes when you don't designate a driver. Walking in heels can be tough!

  4. You can always find a place to eat.  From cookies to dollar pizza to street meat to pretty much anything, food is always available and often cheap.
  5. Nowhere is off-limits.  Though you may have to wait a bit longer for subways to arrive the closer it gets to sunrise, every borough is at your fingertips.  This also allows for you to try a new place when “the usual” just isn’t enough. 

The bad news?  Money doesn’t grow on trees, and, if it did, you still wouldn’t have any because you likely don’t have any trees growing on your fire escape.  The city is always outside your door, always awake, and always hungry for your wallet.  Plus, the fact that you may or may not already be going broke paying for a college education doesn’t help any.

However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned in the past four years, it’s that you should always be prepared.  If you plan out at least part of your night ahead of time, you don’t have to pay much for a night of fun.

  1. Eat dinner home.  Instead of going out to eat, make dinner with some friends in someone’s kitchen or have a potluck dinner.  This is often cheaper and healthier, and allows you to start the weekend celebration together and then head out when everyone is accounted for.

    Leave yourselves a large tip with all the money you save when you celebrate at home with friends.

  2. Buy your own alcohol. If you are 21 and drink, look online for which liquor stores or beer distributors have the best deals on your beverage(s) of choice, and hit them up before they close.  Make your own concoctions, which can be fun!  And, if you do go out afterwards, you’ll probably be less tempted to spend money on overpriced drinks.
  3. Arrive early.  Many locations (bars and clubs alike) that charge cover fees charge differently according to what time it is.  If your usual bar has a good happy hour, meet up with a few friends for cheap drinks.  If a club says that admission is free before ten o’clock, consider getting there early.  Don’t forget to account for the time it takes to wait on line!  Also, when possible, be female—you’ll probably pay less to get in to some places.
  4. Have your own dance/karaoke/movie/theme party.  Sometimes a night in can be even more rewarding than a night out.
  5. Take advantage of your college or university.  While you might associate school events with middle school dances when the sexes stood on opposite sides of the room and stared at their feet or giggled in circles, school-sponsored events can often be fun.  The people putting them together are probably either paid to do it (and probably at least somewhat good at it) or they are college students just like you with similar ideas of fun.  Check your school events calendar, as well as any deals that your school and local businesses offers like student-price movie tickets, coupons, brochures, and other student savings.  You’ll be surprised what you can find!

It's who you're with that counts most.

Of course, there is no perfect formula for saving money, but over time you should discover what works for you and learn your own methods along the way.  While you’re in college, remember that you’re in college.  Remember that you’re not the only one concerned about saving money while having fun, that there are whole schools of students worried about the same thing.  In this realization you can find your savior—your friends.  No matter where you’re going or what you’re doing, surround yourself by good people and you can’t go wrong.

 

Take advantage of a great happy hour at Cuba!

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Carina, New York University. Read my blog and check out my Twitter! FOLLOW ME!!

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onLove: When Friends Pay a Visit

Thursday, July 7th, 2011

One of the great things about living in a vibrant city like New York is that my friends from back home are always more than willing to come visit me. Especially now that summer is in full swing, plenty of out-of-town friends are staking their claim on available weekends and planning overnight stays at my apartment. These get-togethers are usually marked by touristy outings, drinks at what is deemed to be a “classy” wine bar or lounge, and people-watching in Union Square at 2AM.

While I do love my friends dearly, gone are the days of having a large, three-bedroom apartment with multiple roommates and plenty of space for people to crash at the night’s end. Now, in my humble one-bedroom abode, I have a futon shoved haphazardly into my kitchen area, which is usually an uncomfortable 90+ degrees thanks to my refusal to buy an air-conditioner (equal parts laziness and thriftiness.) The other sleeping arrangement I can offer my guest is for us to share my bed. But two sweaty, adult bodies on a full-sized mattress pretty much negates my sad little desk fan, which spins madly in the night as it struggles in vain to keep the room cool.

Of course I preface any potential visitation with a disclaimer, warning my guests that my apartment is nothing like the glamorous ones they may have seen on sitcoms and other television shows based in NYC. But no matter how much I try to prepare my friends for the harsh reality of non-luxury New York City apartments, it seems as though I never do a good enough job, because many arrive and their eyes instantly widen in surprise. Beads of sweat form on their brow, the inevitable result of walking up four flights of stairs. And their discomfort is apparent as they take a quick survey of my cluttered, cramped space.

After the initial shock wears off, there is always another concern hovering in the air: What are my friends going to do the entire time they’re here? For some, this is their first time in New York sans elementary school field-trip itinerary. Your friend will turn to you for advice on where to go, what to see, where to eat… and you’ll be expected to provide answers. So the awkward but necessary question comes shortly after my friend gets settled.

“Uh… what do you wanna do?” I ask, hoping my inquisition will not be met with silence, a shrug, or a hasty “I dunno, what do you wanna do?”

In order to avoid being caught in an awkward verbal ping-pong match, where half-hearted ideas are lobbed back and forth for several minutes, try to keep a few fail-safe plans tucked away in the back of your mind.  Even if you just spend an hour regrouping at an air-conditioned cafe, your friend will appreciate your taking the initiative. Also, this is a great time to take advantage of all the student discounts and fun activities the city has to offer. A trip to a museum or impromptu elevator ride to the top of the Empire State Building will help remind even the most jaded New Yorker that the city is teeming with diversity and life. And local knowledge coupled with the enthusiasm and excitement that a visitor brings can lead to a great bonding experience.

If offering up your couch isn’t a realistic option, friends can still visit—just work out another arrangement before they arrive.  There are plenty of affordable hotels, and some are even offering reduced rates during the summer. Blue Moon Hotel on Orchard Street (between Broome and Delancey) is offering a student discount of 10%.  As a compromise for their staying elsewhere, you can offer to treat your friends to a lunch or pay for their ticket to one of the exhibits you end up visiting.

-Alex Agahigian, NYU-

I have lots of other things to say

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Friendship for Two

Sunday, July 3rd, 2011

A true friendship is one of the most valuable things in the world. Bonds with family are important, but they are also predetermined. A friend is someone you choose, based on your own plans or whims, your own criteria, your own conditions. In a way, the friends you choose say a lot about the person you are.

“So, you’ve never tried bubble tea?”

Tapioca

Two cups of Bubble Tea with tapioca

I’ve never been the kind of person who assertively seeks friends. What does that say about me? I’ve always been the type who wades in the water until a more aggressive swimmer decides to scream “Marco!” first. However, one friendship of mine has changed that.

“C’mon, I’ll take you to the best bubble tea place in Chinatown.”

Two years ago, I met Cassandra Lee through a mutual friend and she single-handedly transformed my life. Of course, when I first met her, I didn’t know that that would be the case. Every friendship starts off modestly, unassuming, even a bit suspicious. Traversing past the introductions is the fun part about meeting someone new, with the hope that you’ll both find something you can relate to.

“Hmm… well we have to find Mott Street. Then I’ll know the way from there.”

With Cassandra, introductions were completely unnecessary. She likes to jump right into the thick of things only to pull something out and make it into something new. When I met her, there was no awkwardness and no second-guessing. Her can-and-will-do attitude was infectious. No, I wouldn’t jump off of a bridge if Cassandra wanted to, but then again, she would cancel whatever was on her schedule if the jump included bungee cords. Like I said, she loves getting into the thick of things, but within reason.

“See, there’s fruit-flavored tea and milk teas. We could each get one and share.”

That’s the most amazing thing about Cassandra. She doesn’t act too radically to a point where it’s simply outrageous, but she doesn’t hesitate when she knows there’s some risk involved either. She is the eye of the storm: calm, but central to the integrity of all the commotion that surrounds her. And when we met I was proud to become a part of that commotion.

“You stab the straw right through the top. I always aim for the little guy’s nose: dead center!”

Since I met Cassandra, I’ve begun to realize a lot about myself. Life is certainly worth living more than once. After all of the mistakes you make the first go around, it would be interesting to see how things went if you were given a second chance. But the life you live now is the only one that’s guaranteed. You have to make the most of it despite what anyone tells you. When I met Cassandra, I realized I had to start making the most out of my life.

“The tapioca is the best part! I’m learning how to make the bubbles myself.”

Cassandra taught me how to live life in the moment, and I’ll always value our friendship for that. I didn’t choose to be friends with Cassandra, but I’m glad she chose me. It’s helped me recognize that decisions are to be made in life and you shouldn’t shy away from them. You have to make those decisions and not let them make you.

“Of course, I like to get one to-go and throw it in the fridge when I get home. At least until I’m really good at making my own.”

Cassandra has always been good at making her life her own and as a result, I’ve started to do so as well.

–Christopher Cusack, Hofstra University

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Avoiding Conflict at a Group Meal

Wednesday, June 15th, 2011

Nothing is more obnoxious at dinner than getting attacked for your food choices.

No matter how proud you are about your healthy eating choices, there are always a few people with whom, even if they claim to be understanding and open-minded, you would just rather not get into a heated debate. Usually, they are the type to easily start said heated debates without realizing they raised their voices, and before you know it, you wish you hadn’t even brought up the topic of climate change/political efficacy/favorite color at all.

Though you may not be able to avoid every potential “friendly intellectual discussion” they want to have, there are a few ways to at least circumvent frustrating situations while eating out with friends. First, when collectively deciding where to go for dinner, it’s best not to throw out suggestions that are obviously specialty restaurants. Even if the name gives no hint, once the group arrives there and sees that the menu has absolutely no meat on it, your friends could feel tricked. Since you would like others to accommodate your food choices, try to think of their preferences too. If you are trying to avoid gluten, suggest a restaurant that you know has gluten-free options. If you are a vegan, throw out names of places that you know will have food you can eat but also has meat and vegetarian dishes.

Of course, after going through all of the motions of democracy, you might end up at a restaurant you have never been to and didn’t have time to research their menu. If there’s one thing that might set off your opinionated friends into an unsolicited rant, it’s watching you take fifteen minutes to order because you’re asking your server for comprehensive lists of ingredients. But you’ve been to restaurants before, and the menus for certain ethnic cuisines are practically the same citywide. Once you’ve researched one restaurant and found which dishes are safe, you can assume to a degree for other places with similar styles. A little research into pasta types will let you know which kinds have eggs, and looking up traditional recipes for Japanese foods will let you know where soy can be hiding. This can cut down on the number of questions to ask the server and avoid placing a focus on you. Great places to try for big groups are Indian restaurants with their diverse meat and vegetarian options and choices of rice or bread. Use a Campus Clipper coupon to get 15% off on a weekend when you bring 4 people or more at Cuisine of India!

Even if your friends are aware of your dietary choices, they may forget in their attempts to be generous and offer you a bite of their order. Rather than going into the reasons why you can’t share their meal, a simple “No thanks. I’m good.” will suffice. To avoid further insistence, either immediately return to your previous conversation and/or return their action by offering them some of your food. Keep the dialogue going so that it doesn’t linger too long on the table and its trappings.

When all else fails and someone decides s/he really wants to talk about why you don’t eat dairy in an opinionated and gregarious manner, let him/her go through the spiel. Chances are s/he just wants to voice opinions about it, and whether or not you respond matters less than getting the rant out of his/her system. Even if you aren’t in the mood to debate, other people might want to jump into the discussion, which will take the pressure off of you to be the sole interlocutor. If you are in a group setting, the rest of your party most likely wants the same thing you do: to hang out with friends while eating good food and having lively conversation with more laughs than speeches. If you’ve picked the right friends, they won’t let one person gang up on you or bring everyone else down.

-Avia Dell’Oste.

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Going the Distance

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

People didn’t start leaving me until I went to college. All my life people stayed close by. My older siblings all stayed within a twenty-mile radius for college and when it came for my friends and I to apply to college, we didn’t dare look beyond the tri-state area.

When I first got to college I was ecstatic to find out that my new friends and newly acquired boyfriend all lived within an hour of our school. My family would come and visit on a weekly basis and many of my friends were just a subway stop away for me; everything was going great. That is, until sophomore year. Mallori, my best friend since I was 8 years old, decided to study abroad. She wanted to go to Ireland for an entire semester to be exposed to another culture.

“But what about your family, Mal?” I asked.

Really, what I was trying to say was “what about me?!” I personally didn’t have what it took to live in another country, let alone live outside New York, (I have what they call, “fear of leaving the island”) and to see her go was hard. That semester, instead of going down into the city to meet and go out at night, we had Skype and calling cards on hand for emergency girl talks.

When she came back, I thought I was in the clear. I had the summer going into junior year with everyone home to keep me company. But that summer as my boyfriend and I became closer, he let me in on a little secret; he had decided to study abroad in Brazil for spring semester. At first it was okay, we had a few months left together and when he left, we would make it work… I hoped. I mean, a friendship could easily survive separation, but a relationship? Even on the day his plane took off, I wasn’t sure we’d make it. And as the days went on, it only became harder and harder. I suddenly realized I had to act like a taken girl but I was always alone. I had the commitment, but none of the perks of a relationship. No handholding, no kisses, no napping together—no nothing. That semester I hardly went out. My mindset was to just get to class, get all my homework done and get to bed at a decent hour. My two roommates, who were both in relationships, would try to include me and keep me occupied, but it always ended up making me feel sourer. They were constantly pushing me to go out with them at night but it was a rare occasion when I actually did. I hated the end of the night too much. My roommates would all go to their boyfriends’ apartments and I would do a lonely walk back to our dorm room.  There were many nights I would be alone and cry in my bed listening to the commotion of students laughing and flirting and having the kind of night I had to wait four more months for.

But it got better.

One day it dawned on me that I was the one causing my own unhappiness and maybe this separation could be viewed as a good thing instead of a bad one. And with that revelation, everything changed. A whole new part of my life emerged. I began socializing and making friends with people I normally wouldn’t have time for, I met with teachers and excelled in class, I worked on my writing and made time for new hobbies and even got this internship at the Campus Clipper! I was happy and felt content with myself. I realized that there was no reason to fear leaving or being left behind. New York is an amazing city—no doubt about that—but if an opportunity came where I would have to leave, it would be okay to go. College pulls people physically apart from each other; but that doesn’t mean you have to become estranged from one another! Even if you aren’t a quick drive from each other, you are still just a call or an email away. When you really care and love people, a little distance is healthy and can make you value them more than you have before. Now that my boyfriend is home, our relationship is stronger then ever.  Our time with each other is precious but we make sure to make time for ourselves and other parts of our lives. It’s important to remember that if you’re far away from home or someone you’re close with leaves for a college that’s far away, remember that yes, the distance is hard, but they can always come and visit! You’re in New York City! They can come stay at the Blue Moon Hotel that’s right between Little Italy and SOHO and spend your days running around the city together (you couldn’t ask for a better excuse to do all the touristy stuff).  It’s important to feel grounded not by where you are but by what you do, and to remember that life always gets better if you give yourself the chance to grow.

Jackie Aqel

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Vagabonding in NYC

Friday, December 3rd, 2010

Written by Megan Soyars

Soon after I arrived in New York City, I found myself unemployed, friendless, and—worst of all—homeless.

I’d headed up to NYC from Texas on a something of a romantic whim. I’d seen the Big Apple portrayed glamorously in movies and television, I’d listened to Alicia Key’s New York, rocking my head to the beat and thinking, I could make it there. Life in the city drew me like a moth to flame, and just like a moth, my journey was unplanned and perilous. I simply packed up my bags, bid my parents farewell, and hopped on an overnight flight.

When I arrived in NYC early next morning, exhausted yet disparately exhilarated, I called up my friend to let her know I had arrived. I’d made arrangements to sleep on her couch for a week or two till I found my own place. She responded to my call with a devastating message—her grandmother had fallen ill and was moving in to live with them. In other words, I had no place to crash that night. I made some desperate scrambling and secured a $65 room at the YMCA for the next two days. Then I called up another random friend, who agreed to let me sleep on her futon for three or so weeks. But then she kicked me out early. Once again I was a vagabond.

After a month of hostel-hopping throughout the city, I was desperate to find a permanent place. I was tired of moving, tired of suffering through uncomfortable beds and loud hostel-mates, tired of throwing away clothes and toiletries to lighten my load.

While my fellow hostel-mates (all international kids around my own age) headed to the Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty, and other bustling attractions, I sat hunched over my laptop in the lounge, scouring the housing ads on Craigslist. Then I made a discovery—a discovery that turned around my hapless situation and ultimately made my experience in New York City an inspiring one.

That discovery was the existence of Centro Maria Woman’s Residence. Centro Maria is one of several boarding houses in NYC. These boarding houses provide a safe and peaceful place to stay for hundreds of young people. Depending on the house, a person pays between $400 to $1,000 a month for a furnished room. Many of the rooms are single, but some are double or triple if you’d prefer a roommate. Several residences also provide meals, usually two a day.

So everything was provided for me at Centro Maria. I had a clean, furnished room, complete with a bed, dresser, desk, chair, and sink. I was given free home-cooked, delicious meals twice a day. I had access to a library, TV lounge, and computers. And all for $720 a month! But not only that, I was given a sense of community.

Centro Maria is run by the Sisters of Mary Immaculate. The Sisters genuinely care about each woman in the house. It is like having several moms who are all ready to lend a helping hand. I also have a great roommate; she is from South Korea and studying English here. And I’ve met so many friends during breakfast and dinner in the dining room downstairs.

I still remember how lonely I was when bumming from hostel to hostel during my first months in New York. I’d lay awake at night, listening to my hostel-mates chatter in their own language as they packed up their luggage for a midnight flight. I’m so thankful that I found Centro Maria, and I know the residence is a great option for students like you.

Perhaps you’re living somewhere temporarily, or somewhere that you don’t want to be. Maybe you’re tired of the dorms, or your roommate, or you’re running out of money and need an affordable place to live. Consider Centro Maria! You don’t only get a room here; you get a family. And who knows—maybe I’ll see you at the residence soon!

Contact Centro Maria at 212-757-6989 or cenmariany@mindspring.com to secure a room. Or check out the many other NYC boarding houses available at this website.

And, if you’d like to know more about student housing, pre-order our $9.95 NYC Student Guide today by emailing us at clip@campusclipper.com.

-Megan, Trinity University

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Make New Friends and Keep the Old: Wet, Hot, New York Summer

Tuesday, July 27th, 2010

This past weekend, College Girl was up in the city visiting me.  We devoted about two hours only to talking about her split with Navy Boy (after which I promptly defriended him on facebook – I am of the opinion that it’s totally appropriate for friends to hold grudges for each other when one half of the friendship is too nice to be mad on their own behalf, but I digress) and the rest of the weekend enjoying New York City in the summer.

I have no job, and all of my friends know this.  They know that my life is primarily dictated by how much money my parents are willing to give me at any given time, and seeing as how College Girl is their favorite friend of mine, they weren’t too hard to get money from for the weekend.  However, I set myself to the task of finding free things to do, and as most of us either know or are learning, there’s plenty to do in the city that’s free.  I think I’ve seen a few blogs from some of the other bloggers dedicated entirely to the city’s free events scattered throughout the summer.

Brooklyn Bridge Park and Bryant Park both have movies showing throughout the summer, sponsored by SyFy and HBO, respectively.  In Brooklyn, every Thursday you can see a movie with the sun setting on Manhattan in the background and music provided by a DJ.  Their selection is varied, from Dreamgirls to Rear Window to The Big Lebowski and I’m counting down the days until August 26th when they’ll be playing Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.   Bryant Park is showing old school Hollywood movies, with classic favorites Rosemary’s Baby and Carousel. These two parks aren’t the only places showing free movies throughout the summer, but they’re my two favorites.

College Girl got to New York via the Megabus right around noon, just in time for a day of thunderstorms.  I have this standing theory that whenever I have a visitor, the weather is going to be bad, and the rain starting just as she texted me that she was in her cab is my case and point.  We wandered around my area of East Harlem for a while, not completely out of the rain even with umbrellas, before an impromptu trip to Whole Foods for ice cream, waffles, and pie.  Let it be known that from my stop on the 6 to the Whole Foods at Union Square takes about half an hour, but it’s definitely worth it for the blueberry pie.  After that we decided on an easy night of Chinese food and “Degrassi.”  Laughing at the absurdity of a tornado warning in New York that night, we both relaxed and caught up on each other’s lives, hoping that the next day would bring nicer weather and a chance for me to show off what I’ve learned about the city from living in it on my own for a year.

One of the best things about the city in the summer, not even taking into account the free opportunities offered, is Central Park.  With that said, Central Park is the perfect place for those with few funds to hang out.  Every summer Central Park is host to Shakespeare in the Park, often boasting big name actors that love their craft so much they are willing to put on a free show.  Tickets are hard to come by, free as they are, and can be gotten through an online lottery or standing in line for hours.  Saturday was The Merchant of Venice, and as much as I enjoy Shakespeare I wasn’t that interested until I saw the name Al Pacino.   I haven’t lived in the city long enough to be  immune to the appeal of stars like him, and again, the fact that such a thing is free, blows my mind.

Central Park also has its Summer Stage, and since we were unable to get tickets to Shakespeare in the Park, College Girl and I walked around until we literally stumbled upon a crowd of people all heading to, what we soon discovered, a free performance of the  Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater.  With the air cooling thanks to the sun going down, we watched the Alvin Ailey dancers with the soundtrack of live blue music in the background, and it was maybe of my favorite experiences of the city so far.

-Mary K

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Posted in Friendship, onEntertainment, onLove, Out On The Town, Outside Manhattan, Relationships, Student Maximu$ Summer/Fall 2010, Uniqueness in NYC | No Comments »

Make New Friends and Keep the Old: Breaking Up is Hard to Do

Tuesday, July 6th, 2010

After seven years of dating, Navy Boy and College Girl have ended things.  Five months into an engagement that surprised absolutely no one, the two of them called it quits quietly somewhere between New Jersey and Washington on a cross country road trip they set out on together.  I’m sure there’s a metaphor in there somewhere, them driving to Washington together and her flying home, alone.  I think that if this was a movie, she would have gone to the airport only to be stopped by him at the last moment with a grand gesture and a “Stay with me!”  But it’s not.

Navy Boy and College Girl breaking up is a difficult for me to accept as it is for a young child’s parents getting divorced.  I said it before that I don’t like change, and I really don’t.  Navy Boy is being deployed somewhere in two weeks, and I think his deployment involves being in a submarine for three months or something but I can’t remember and it’s not something I feel right asking either of them about.

The two of them were the basis of every argument I’ve ever had about things working out if you try hard enough when it comes to distance and those you love, but I think now they’re working more towards the “If you love something, let it go” end of the cliché spectrum.  My dad actually brought that saying up when he first heard about the two of them, and it’s funny to me that he would say that, that he was as invested in two kids’ relationship as much as any of their friends were.  I think, more than anyone else, my two friends know what it’s like to deal with growing up.  Both know what it’s like to sacrifice for someone you love, and to know when giving up on each other doesn’t really mean giving up on each other, but that it’s still the best thing to do even if it hurts.

College is a time for meeting new people, seeing new things, experiencing new experiences.  They’re both going to get that chance now, though in different ways, and that’s a good thing.

-Mary K

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Posted in Friendship, onLove, Relationships | No Comments »

Networking: the art of knowing a guy who knows a guy.

Monday, July 5th, 2010

I attended a pretty blah networking workshop the other day but managed to walk away from it with some  not-so-blah food for thought:
Networking–you can and should always be doing it. Although workshop instructors make it out to be a science, it’s really more of a life philosophy. It’s the the acknowledgment that anyone we meet at any point can take us to new and exciting places regardless of whether they help us out or we help them out.

Networking is about coming to terms with the fact that by yourself you are a pretty small entity, but with links to others, your reach is infinitely broader and your possibilities increase exponentially.

Sound good? Okay, so where do you start?

With the very next person you encounter.

It means genuinely taking an interest in the people around you without a specific end goal in mind. After all, you can’t pin point a goal until you have some information, so just go information digging. Make it your mission to keep searching until you discover something about the person that
surprises, intrigues, or excites you. Keep exploring till you hear yourself saying: “Oh! Really?” And focus on listening, asking open ended questions, and thinking of how you or someone in your network could help this person out. Introduce people to one another whenever the opportunity arises. Remember also to network with people you already now. The person who is now your physics homework buddy can also turn out to be an event planning guru or know someone who is.
So connect yourself, connect others, then reconnect–as long as it’s genuine and you are interested in the give as much as the take. Let’s make this world a more collaborative sandbox.

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Posted in Friendship, onJobs, onValues, Relationships | No Comments »

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