You wish they'd support you in everything, but that doesn't always happen.
When I first told my parents I had turned vegan, they were surprisingly supportive. I was expecting them to yell, to tell me how bad it was for my health, and pretty much refuse to accommodate my new dietary restrictions whenever I visited. What I didn’t expect was how quickly their surprise faded as they acquiesced to my silly choices. They probably thought it was a fad, like the time I stopped eating seafood for a while because I thought it was wrong to take from our Mother Ocean. I was a weird kid.
I didn’t visit my parents often, but when I did, they seemed to be very considerate when preparing family dinners, always making sure that my share was separate. My mom would always dole out some sautéed vegetables on my plate before adding pork to the rest of the veggies. Then, one day when I was at home alone with my dad, he offered me some traditional soup made from seaweed, which isn’t as gross as it sounds for a Korean like me. As I ate, wholly innocently and suspecting nothing, I noticed it tasted kind of fishy.
“Dad,” I said, “is this a seafood broth or something?”
“What? Of course not,” he replied.
I still thought it tasted odd, but I believed him. That is, until I dipped my spoon in and pulled out the innards of a clam.
“DAD!”
“What? What?”
He said something ridiculous, like it must have fallen in by accident, but I knew he had simply taken some seafood soup they had made, picked all the clams out, and had just missed one. Of course, I couldn’t help but wonder if he had been doing sneaky things like that the whole time when my mom wasn’t looking.
When it came time for the New Year’s Day family gathering, we all went to my grandmother’s house for the traditional rice cake soup on the first day of the new year. When I sat at the table, I noticed that my bowl’s contents looked pretty milky, like everyone else’s did, like it had been cooked with bone marrow. I asked my mom about it, and my dad frustratedly interjected.
“Oh my god, just eat it!”
I felt my family’s patience waning. What they thought was a phase had become a new lifestyle, and they were finally coming to terms with accommodating me for the rest of their lives. They were not happy about it.
Despite the requisite compassion for living creatures, vegans have to develop a bit of a thick skin. Even if we never try to convince others to walk our path, people will take it upon themselves to attack beliefs that are different from theirs. It’s especially hurtful when such criticism comes from family, who we expect to support us. But like every other choice I made that my family initially thought was irrational, they eventually came around and accepted that I make my own decisions. My parents may never believe that veganism is sane or healthy like I want them to, but they still love me for who I am.
Even though… I still check the labels on anything my dad gives me.
Try dispelling some of their skepticism with Vegan Treats. It’s guaranteed to work better than a lecture. Scroll down for a dual coupon to Atlas Café, where all the desserts are deceptively vegan, and save the 20% Teany Café coupon for a cute and healthy teatime with your friends.
-Avia Dell’Oste.
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